This is the introduction chapter. I didn't answer any submissions because, well, I just started! Therefore, I had to make an impression. I wrote an introduction paragraph trying my best to capture Rachel's manner of speaking. As I wrote it, the idea suddenly came to me that Rachel would never use a computer. Keep in mind, she's a mockery of old European aristocracy; wherein the lords and ladies were not expected to perform any menial labor, no matter how easy some tasks may be. Dictating her writings not only made more sense, but suited her personality better. Also, I didn't start the intro with something like, "Greetings. I am Rachel Alucard." I went for a more arrogant sounding route that basically said, "If you don't already know who I am, then you have no business here." In a way, she's right; my fanfic is by a Blaz Blue fan and for Blaz Blue fans. If a stranger tried to read Ask Rachel Alucard, they'd be completely lost.
Oh, also, when Rachel said, "I could indulge you with anecdotes of my life here on this webspace . . . (but I won't)" that was a lie. Many of the intro and concluding paragraphs in future entries usually detail a story in Rachel's life. And I posted the usual disclaimers, (it's non-canon, Rachel doesn't believe everything I believe, etc.) and done.
Chapter 2
My first entry came from an email by Sieg-sama. The order of the questions is actually different. The actual order as it appeared in my email was so:
"Dear Rachel: Why is there so much . . . RachelxNoel art on the official BlazBlue site? . . . Do vampires sparkle? (AKA your take on Twilight) . . . Is Nago gay?" I thought it would be more amusing if I reversed the order.
The first question I answered dealt with Nago's sexuality. Because of his Mah-velous manner of speech, some fans like to think he's gay. I could be wrong, but I think otherwise; Nago (in my fanfic anyways) claims he doesn't limit himself to one orientation. In short, he's bisexual in my opinion. Of course, considering that he's also obsessed with sex, I think I unintentionally perpetuated the Depraved Bisexual stereotype. (Just so you know, I don't assume all people attracted to both sexes are sex maniacs. I know a bisexual person in real life who isn't. And I'm absolutely certain that if I was bi, I wouldn't be a sex maniac either.) But I just went with it for the chuckles.
Question 2 dealt with Twilight, however, as it appears in Ask Rachel Alucard, the Twilight name is censored out. Well, I plan to do a "retcon", for you see, Rachel actually knows about the Twilight franchise, but she hates it so much, she refuses to acknowledge it by name. I have no experience with anything concerning Twilight; I just know that every last one of my online friends absolutely. Ha. ATES. Twilight, and Rachel's rant was based on their complaints.
Question 3 I saved for last because I believed it to have the best humor value. On the Japanese Blaz Blue website, there's a page for selling merchandise. Some of this merchandise shows pictures of Noel and Rachel . . . um . . . not wearing very much. The only reason such artwork would exist would be to excite otakus. Well, Rachel's response was basically her immediate reaction to seeing these pics. This started the running gag of Rachel being repulsed by sexuality. This was another common trait of the noble class; to avoid the subject of sex whenever possible. Not only that, in the actual Blaz Blue canon, Rachel comes across as very asexual to me; she's not dressing to impress a mate, she never talks about love and sexuality, and as such, I wrote her as such a person. I could be wrong, though; several authors on FF.net would have me believe otherwise. But yes, her immediate reaction was golden. By the way, those images were echi, not hentai. If Rachel came across Rule 34 . . . it would mean the end of the human race as we know it.
Chapter 3
In the intro, Rachel notes that being posted on FF.net makes your entries look rather . . . primitive. If she had a more elaborate blog, I'd imagine it'd look more to her liking; have a portrait of her, make the blog look like Gothic architecture, but alas, that is not to be.
The question by animefanrk2k asked if Rachel knew about fictional vampires, citing Dracula, "The Alucards," and Arcueid from Tsukihime as examples. However, as per one of my disclaimers, Rachel didn't reveal if she knew any vampires in her reality, but she had heard of the examples listed. She knows that her last name is Dracula spelt backwards, and that some versions of Dracula are better than others. (Aside: my favorite version of Dracula? The 1979 film starring Frank Langella as Dracula. It's a must-watch.) She then mentions that she's also heard of Alucard from Hellsing, but doesn't identify Hellsing by name. Okay, to be honest, I am most definitely NOT a fan of the Hellsing franchise, and that's putting it lightly. However, to a vampire, Hellsing would appear less "blasphemous" than Twilight, so Rachel didn't really insult Hellsing, but rather, the idiot fanboys who only like it for its violence and sexual content. Man, they are annoying. Oh yeah, Rachel's aside was from the fact that her last comment should've ended with a smilie, but she refused to have that printed, because let's face it; printing a smilie would look crass, especially to a noblewoman.
And man, you people are lucky; I had just discovered Tsukihime like a week before I started writing Ask Rachel Alucard. If I hadn't, I wouldn't have been able to comment on Arcueid. Well, I couldn't say much, because I didn't want to spoil Tsukihime's plot, but I noted that Arc, like Rachel, has blonde hair and red eyes. Why do Japanese authors think that all vampires have blonde hair and red eyes? I mean, sure, I like red eyes, but seriously, it's a little obvious, don't you think? Oh, also, those comments Rachel mentioned? I found comments like that in an imageboard talking about Arc; there are some . . . very devoted fanboys out there, to say the least.
As for the second question, Rachel's right; Baroque and Classical music are from two different eras of European music. If you make such a mixup in front of a music professor, expect to get chewed out.
Chapter 4
A question by Cypher0120 asked about Rachel's "social link level" with Ragna, like she's from a Persona game. I had to be careful here; I'm dealing with the concept of relationshipping here, and whilst I myself am usually not too fanatical about shipping, I realized, I'm on FF.net right now, a place that will cut you to shreds if you so much as raise the subject of whom Ichigo should hook up with. So I made it vague; Rachel may very well be in love in Ragna, or maybe she isn't. Maybe in a later game in the canon, she will go all gooey from just thinking about Ragna, or maybe not. The only thing certain at this point is that Rachel does have more respect for Ragna than what she normally has for guys like him. Interesting, to say the least.
The second question by Wraith the Destroyer asked what Rachel thought of the other playable characters. Her opinions are basically as such: Jin is an asshole who needs to be seriously reprimanded, Noel is a moeblob half the time, but can actually do stuff when she's serious, Litchi's boobs have got to be fake, Arakune is creepy to say the least, Bang is an obnoxious Kamina ripoff, Carl is just projecting onto his "sister" so that he isn't lonely, Taokaka is a cat . . . that talks, and therefore is hellspawn, Tager is alright so long as he isn't in his "Golden" form, Hakumen is like Jin, except less mean and more driven to beat the "justice" out of everyone in order to save the space-time continuum, and Nu is a freak who can't decide whether she wants to hug Ragna or destroy the world. Most of my own opinions for the characters are more positive than Rachel's, but she is right about Jin; someone needs to slap him.
The last bit is a sketch wherein Nago reveals to Gii that he's been watching an anime featuring a naked Rachel look-a-like. I was hoping someone would send a question asking if that was Dance in the Vampire Bund, (which it was), but yeah; Nago likes that show, (no surprise) but Gii, well, I don't think it's up his alley.
P.S. Shinji/Asuka 4 life.
Chapter 5
The cold opening is not one I made up; there is a yonkoma comic series on the Japanese site for Blaz Blue. One of the comics shows Rachel doing her hair in a ponytail, only for Ragna to point out that Bang also has a ponytail, which she responds by zapping him. There was no dialog, but I added some in my version.
The question by Osaka cha-ness asked if Rachel was anything like Evangeline A.K. McDowell. I looked up Wikipedia and tvtropes, and learned that Evangeline was a character from Mahou Sensei Negina, a series . . . that I know absolutely nothing about. What information I did scrounge up, I printed, so long as it didn't sound like a huge spoiler. Hopefully, I didn't print anything erroneous about Evangeline.
The second question by
And of course, Rachel comments yet again on another vampire girl, this one Remilia. She notes that Remilia is a vampire noble like her, but is also one who is much more selfish than Rachel. Being as someone who has written my own interpretation of Remilia, I have noted the following: Remilia is more polite than Rachel, but more childish, whereas Rachel is more mature than Remilia, but also more condescending. Writing vampire princesses is fun!
Chapter 6
The cold open here references a scene from the arcade mode of the first Blaz Blue. I played as Rachel, and her encounter with Litchi started off a dialog passage that played out pretty much like what I described. This age confusion has to be a constant source of frustration for Rachel.
The questions by Heartful Peach were from an email. The first question asked about Rachel's family. In truth, I'd actually like to know that myself. However, I couldn't answer that because of my spoiler clause. As for question two, it's hard to say; all that is known at the moment is that Rachel's estate exists in a dimension other than our own, and that her stage is entitled "Halloween." By the way, if any fighting game developers are reading this, put more thought into naming your arenas; you'll make yourself more respectable in doing so. Question three was about her favorite weather. Hint; her favorite weather condition is the same as my own favorite weather condition. There are times when our minds overlap, man. But I also had to remark on the last paragraph of the email; you see, Heartful Peach's profile lists Rachel as one of her favorite fictional characters of all time, (hey, if you're gonna list a vampire girl, I say better Rachel than Seras Victoria. BURN!) and the email said she was a "follower" of Rachel's. Rachel hoped that Heartful Peach wasn't a fangirl by the end of that response.
The question by Kaori the Mystery is a legitimate question; why is Rachel so choosy about her teas? Well, I think it's just a side effect of her upbringing. Anything less than ideal would displease her.
Chapter 7
The cold open references the fansite Fighter's Generation, which said that Rachel was practically perfect as a character. This, combined with the emails, made Rachel feel almost sentimental. But then, that ends when she mentions that some of her fans upset her. I've seen forum posts say that Rachel is "hawt" or that she's cute, (and let's be honest; she is kind of cute.) However, in her upbringing, beauty, grace, and dignity are favored for noblewomen, not cuteness and sexiness.
The question by
"aren’t you a bit too N-E-G-A-T-I-V-E?!"
But FF.net won't let me print an exclamation mark and a question mark together, so there you go. As for the question, it's a legitimate question; why is Rachel so mean to people? Well, first off, I actually have portrayed Rachel here as less of a bitch than in the first Blaz blue game, but on the other hand, as she said, that may just be a side effect of online communication. My guess is that Rachel was raised on ridiculously high standards, and combine that with the fact that her home is in a separate dimension from ours. Being isolated and spoiled is most likely what makes her so condescending toward people. (That, and being mistaken for a little human girl.) Also, there is the fact that most people, especially in Blaz Blue's future, aren't raised in aristocracy like Rachel. There's very few people she could relate to, if there is anyone she can relate to. Wow, looking at it like this, Rachel almost feels like a tragic character. But hey, at the very least, she never went so far as to blot out the sky with scarlet mist, am I right? (LOL Touhou reference)
In the ending sequence, since no one asked me about Dance in the Vampire Bund, I just went ahead and had Rachel reveal that she found out about it and that she was, in her words, "Most displeased." [Hint; she says "Most (something)" a lot in my fanfic.] But still, you have to admit, the character of Mina looks almost identical to Rachel. I was surprised to learn the developers didn't try to sue the makers of Dance in the Vampire Bund, until I learned that the original manga version of Dance in the Vampire Bund predates the earliest Blaz Blue game by at least two years. Rachel, upon realizing this, retreats without saying much, possibly because she may've been embarrassed again.
Chapter 8
The intro here is basically my own frustration with FF.net, but reinterpreted by Rachel.
The question here was a pretty basic one; XDarkZeroX asked if Rachel was aware that there was a non-vampire anime girl that resembled her, namely, Fate Testarossa from Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha. I have tried to watch Nanoha, but I couldn't get into it. I do remember that Fate was the one memorable character from that series, and in retrospect, she does look like Rachel in the earlier seasons: "loli" figure, long yellow hair in pigtails, (seriously, is there no other hairstyle for vaguely dark anime girls?) red eyes, yeah, it's definitely noticeable.
The last paragraph exists for two reasons: 1: I don't want to write anymore Ask Rachel Alucard until after I've played through the console version of Blaz Blue: Continuum Shift. I want to incorporate its plot details in future chapters. And 2: I need more responses before I can continue. Keep sending me responses, (preferably after playing Continuum Shift for yourselves) and sometime after the game is released, I will bring back Ask Rachel Alucard. Until then, you're just gonna have to wait.
Now then, the most important question:
"Why Rachel Alucard?"
That's a very good question. Rachel is my second-favorite character Blaz Blue, but not my all-time favorite. Taokaka is my favorite. Why didn't I go with "Ask Tao" instead? Well you see, as much as I love Tao, she is a flat character. Not flat as in boring, but flat as in she isn't very complex. She's basically a cat that can talk and does cute things, and little else. Rachel, by comparison, is a round character. She has more sides to her personality, and is much more complex. With Rachel, I have the ability to respond to questions with answers other than, "Mew? Is that something you eat?" Also, how often do you get the chance to interact with a pompous goth vampire woman? Not very often, I bet.
Although I would like to do one response as Bang sometime. He's my third-favorite character in Blaz Blue, you see . . .