There's something about blogging that bothers me

I can't convey my voice through text.

Because of this, some of my jokes fall flat. You see, in the real world, I have an extremely variable voice, and I can do funny impressions when need be. I could be a professional voice actor. I'm that good.

I have many different voices I can do, and I'm 'mastering' voices at an alarming rate. My most recently 'mastered' voice is that of the purple Mooninite from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. ("Please. Your buttocks are square, and tiny.")

I have printed things on messageboards that would've been a lot funnier if you could just hear my voice. For example, the following is supposed to be said in my "squealing fangirl" impression:

"OH EM GEE!!! CLOUD AND SEPHIROTH!! CLOUD AND SEPHIROTH!!!! U HU HU HU HU HU!!!!!!"

But it's just not the same without my vocal chords. There's been many tv voices I can imitate very well. I can do a pretty good impression of Professor Farnsworth and Dr. Zoidberg from Futurama. I can do an exact impression of Eric Cartman as he sounds on the later seasons of South Park. I can do an exact impression of Tyrone Biggums, the Chappelle's Show character addicted to crack. ("Red Balls, it gives me wings!") I can do a near-exact impression of Roger from American Dad. I can do a pretty good impression of the English voices of Guy, Shikamaru, and Orochimaru from Naruto. The list goes on. I know, it's stuff that's mostly from my generation, but I can't help myself.

But, maybe you could consider this a blessing. Do you know what my most annoying voice is? My (half-assed) impression of Ash Ketchum.

"I'M! GUH NUH! WIIIIIIN!!!!!!"

If you heard me say that, you would be bleeding from the ears.

But still, if only I could deliver audio content of my own somehow . . .

LATE EDIT: Ihihihihihihi!

IHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHHI!

This won't be an issue any longer! Oh no! OH NO!

Dattebayo, bitches.

Since I don't have any of the new game consoles and since my PC is outdated, I can't play very many new games that come out. However, there is a PS2 game coming out next month that I'm buying first chance I get.

Naruto: Ultimate Ninja 3.

I played Ultimate Ninja 2 last year, and absolutely loved it, and I don't normally like fighting games. UN2 was the first fighting game I ever purchased, but I discovered something else important. It's something Japan, Shonen Jump, Viz Media, Tokyo tv, and especially Masashi Kishimoto don't want you to know.

Naruto is actually supposed to be a fighting game series, not a manga/anime series.

Think about it; Naruto the manga and Naruto the anime are decent, but not mind-blowing. But also, all they ever do is fight, fight fight. And also experience a shitload of flashback sequences. But the fights especially, they're more entertaining than the fights in other so-called shonen series, and yet they do crazy stuff also. The characters' chakra lets them do things that we would consider magic. And if they're not fighting, then they're training for the next time they have to fight.

And each character has a 'special move' that no one else can use; Naruto has the Shadow Clones, Sasuke has the Sharingan, Kakashi can mimic and learn his opponents' moves, Gaara has sand manipulation, Shikamaru has shadow possession, Tsunade has healing powers and incredible strength, Lee and Guy are agile and strong in hand-to-hand combat, Orochimaru has snake-like powers, the list goes on.

Tell me I wasn't just describing a series like Street Fighter or Guilty Gear a second ago.

This is why I can't wait for the next installment. I'm anticipating Ultimate Ninja 3 like Kakashi anticipates a new Make Out Paradise novel. More characters, more stuff to do, more customization, and there's now going to be an option to choose between English voices and Japanese voices. Having seen Naruto in English and in Japanese with English fansubs, I can tell you right now that I look forward to playing a Naruto game with the original voice cast.

Believe it.

P.S. to all you Naruto haters out there: if Ninja Gaiden didn't have realistic ninja in it, if Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles didn't have realistic ninja in it, if Mortal Kombat didn't have realistic ninja in it, then why the FUCK are you bitching about that now with Naruto!? If you have to have 'realisitc' ninja in your fiction, watch Shogun or The Last Samurai again. (I recommend both.) Otherwise, find a more valid criticism for Naruto other than this, "They aren't real shinobi!" bullshit.

LATE EDIT: . . . yeah, this was obviously before I bought Guilty Gear AC+ and Blaz Blue.

But this part is still true; Ultimate Ninja 2 is still the first fighting game I ever loved. Took me that long . . . . well, at least I kept an open mind about tourney fighters.

Metal in my mouth

Been out of touch again; some stuff's been happening on the homefront, but now that I'm done with school for the week, I can tell you something major;

I got braces!

That's right, I got metallic braces last Tuesday.

"Wait, aren't you like 22? Why'd you wait so long?"

Well, I wanted to wait until I got my wisdom teeth removed, which I did last year. Also, I wanted to wait for all of my baby teeth to be gone, and for all of my permanent teeth to be in.

Since all three criteria have been met, I decided to get braces. The orthodontist predicts that I'll have braces for two years, then wear a retainer for one year. If I'm lucky though, I might get these braces off sooner.

Now then, do braces hurt? Yes, and no. Right now, they don't hurt, but anytime I put pressure on my teeth, they do. Over time, my teeth and gums should get used to the braces, so they shouldn't hurt whenever I eat in the future.

Also, I can't eat certain things anymore. It's not killing me, but things are different now.

But even still, I am still the same xm0123 as before. I still love videogames, and I still really fucking hate Fruits Basket. God damn, why is that series so popular amongst Japanophiliacs!? Have they no shame!? That shit is intolerable! I must burn all copies of Fruits Basket now. Wish me luck on my holy quest.

LATE EDIT: My braces came off in March of 2010. I now have to wear retainers at night if I want to keep my teeth straight, but hey! I can eat candy again! And I still feel like hating on FB like there's no tomorrow!

Guh! Cold viruses!

I haven't been able to update for a while. Mainly because I got a cold that left me somewhat incapacitated for several days. Only now do I feel well enough to write here.

Also, if you ever want to recover from a cold always do the following; right before you go to bed for the night, take a full dose of Nyquil.

"Hey, I thought you said you were alcohol abstinent!"

Under most circumstances, I am. But I will drug myself with Nyquil if I must. That shit is strong.

I have a more meaningful entry coming up. Hold on.

Bitches Don't Know Bout My Eidolons

A HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! I HAVE DONE IT! I HAVE FINALLY DONE IT!

"Done what?"

I can now emulate PS1 games on my computer! Joy! Rapture!

"Wait, I thought you said the original Playstation had crappy hardware."

Yeah. It does. Now imagine how PS1 games would run on a state-of-the-art (circa 2004) XP-enabled PC, with 3D acceleration.

"I see your point."

I don't know anything about ISOs, so I loaded a CD of a PS1 game I own, the most deserving of PS1 games; Final Fantasy 9. Remember when FF8 came out for the PC, and it looked better than the PS1 version, mainly because the character models weren't pixelated on the PC? FF9 looks like that on my computer. The FMVs are less fuzzy also. And boy howdy, that music sounds better on my 5.1 sourround system than it did on my itty bitty tv stereo. Even the Moogle cries sound correct!

Of course, keep in mind, even with a good 3D card, emulated PS1 games will not look as good as most PS2 games, and certainly not approach the technological absurdity of the "next-gen" consoles.

"Damn it, Jim! I'm a software emulator, not a miracle worker!"

Oh, also, since I'm only running my actual CDs, and since I own an actual original Playstation, (as well as Playstation2.) this emulator is entirely legit. I can't get busted. Booyah!

The only catch is I can't map out the DualShock gamepad onto my keyboard. Megaman Legends 2 is a bitch to play without the joysticks, but I think I can live with that one concession.

That, and access pauses are more noticeable on the emulator. Other than that, looks like I'll be occupied with my PS1 games again.

learnin' at college

I love college. I really do. I love college a hell-of-a-lot more than grade school; people actually care about learning, most students aren't dicks, and I've learned so much more about the world here than in K-12 schools.

That said, I have a few issues.

One; the smoking. I don't know exactly why, but many college students, young and old alike, light up between classes. Anytime I'm passing through buildings, I feel like I'm suffocating under the weight of a lot of cigarette smoke. In RPG terms, you could say anytime I'm outside on my college campus, I become afflicted with poison status.

Two; the binge drinking. Now, this isn't a problem for me, since I'm alcohol abstinent. (Yeah, I am such a fag. I can never be arrested for DUI. Whoop-dee-fuckin'-doo.) Rather, it's my classmates who worry me. Almost everyone close to my age feels the need to get wasted. They view it as a rite of passage. Even people who have serious health problems try to get wasted. (true story.) To which I say, WTF?

Three; child worship. This is a subject first explored by comedian George Carlin in one of his books, and it's one that irritates me as well. Last semester, I was in a speech class. Almost every student in there, of all ages, nationalities, and backgrounds, loved kids. All kids, unconditionally. They thought that all kids were cute, beautiful, smart, loving, and precious. I can see where the precious part comes in, (no children=no future for the human race.) but I'm a realist. I don't show preferential treatment to children. I treat them in an objective, unbiased manner, almost the same manner I treat adults. You know why? 'Cuz most kids aren't cute, smart, and loving. In fact, some of them are complete fuckin' assholes. Buuuuuuuut, the ones who are good to me and other people are children I respect. However, these other people don't live in reality. It's like they have a baby fetish. Not a sexual fetish, that's not what I meant*. Rather, they have an unhealthy obsession with children, and it's really out of balance, I tell you.

Four; the parking. the less said, the better.

Fifth and last; the restrooms. The restrooms aren't bad, per se, rather, it's that the people who use the men's rooms (human males.) forget to flush. Here's a public service announcement; FLUSH THE GODDAMN TOILETS!!!!! IT'S NOT THAT HARD!!!!!!! Thank you.

But if these things don't bother you, you should go to college if you haven't already. It's a great experience.

*"LOL! Everyone in xm's speech class last year is a pedo!" is probably what you want to say right now. Good gravy, that would be frightening if that was true.

Fullmetal Corrections

Stupid inconsistent translations; I got vol. 11, 12, and 13 of Fullmetal Alchemist, only to learn that I apparently misspelled the names of some characters in a previous blog. Apparently, the Prince of Xing is Lin Yao, not Ling Yao, and that cute little alchemist girl is May Chang, not Mei Chan. Man, why do they do this!? They've given two different spelling of Lior and Ishbal, now this!? When will the madness end!? (Hey, since I'm logged on, maybe I can edit my previous article . . .)

But yes, I'm read up to Volume 13 of FMA now, and it shows no sign of slowing down. At all. All the more reason for me to continue whoring myself to this franchise.

I got another article to do that's unrelated. Hold on.

LATE EDIT: Whoa, I was only on volume 13 back then? I'm on volume 25 now. Only two more left! Will my homeboys prevail!?

Come back, Spike!

Man, whatever happened to Buffy the Vampire Slayer?* That was such an awesome, fun, and thrilling show.

I got hooked about three years ago. The show was airings in reruns on FX. My older brother said it was good. Feeling bored, I started watching. I got hooked. I was blown away by the fight scenes, the acting, the fantastic dialogue, and the humor. This is what killing monsters is all about! A band of teenagers, most of which have superpowers, aided by the Watcher Giles, fighting to protect themselves and Sunnydale, and deal with adolescence all at once! It's Scooby Doo but with actual monsters! And they even call themselves the Scooby Gang!

And many of the characters were great, too. Let's see if I can count off the Scoobies: Buffy, Willow, Xander, Cordelia, Giles, Angel, Oz, Anya, Tara, Dawn, it's like they were close friends of mine. And the villains! Awesome villains like the Master, the Mayor of Sunnydale, Angelus, the Super Nerds, Caleb, the First Evil, even some of the one-shot villains were great.

But friends, you all know the best thing about Buffy is Spike, AKA William the Bloody. No TV vampire is as memorable as Spike. This man is a fucking badass! He's witty, he struts likes he owns everyone and everything, he's not afraid to say what's on his mind. Oh man, he' by far my favorite character; my brother's fave too.

Buffy is so good, even my mom sometimes watched with us. I remember an article in TV Guide once read, "Boy, do I miss the Hellmouth." Well, several years later, I can say I really miss the Hellmouth. That's it; I'm buying the DVDs. I need my teenage vampire slaying.

Say what you want, at least Buffy is better than Grey's Anatomy. Yeah, I went there.

*It was cancelled, along with Firefly. Get over yourself, me!

Mr. xm Evaluates Hardware 4 U

Having been a videogamer for most of my life, I have had the chance to try out many different game consoles. I have noticed that some systems, however, have better hardware than others. Some systems are just made to play games, while others, other systems make you weep. I'm noticed that many game systems, even popular ones, typically ran on less-than-ideal CPU processors.

So, to give you an idea of how well game systems run, I shall evaluate every game console I have ever played; hardware-wise. Note: I will only cover tv consoles, not portable consoles. We'll separate by company.

Nintendo. Nintendoin' what Sega can't no more.

Nintendo Entertainment System. Overall: CRAP. For one thing, the hardware is weaker than the Atari 7800. Also, you ever noticed how in most NES games, if you see a baddie on the screen, but just go back until the sprite disappears, and then walk back and the baddie is gone? That's sloppy programming if ever I saw it. Also, two words: NES Blowjob. Need I say more?

Super Nintendo Entertainment System: Overall: EXCELLENT. (say it like Mr. Burns.) What can I say? Superb graphics, sound, stable hardware, this is my favorite Nintendo system of all time. Oh sure, it has a slow CPU, oh sure its relatively few 3D games look horrible, but that's all redeemed by three words: Tales of Phantasia. Or Chrono Trigger. Or Yoshi's Island. Okay, that's more than three words.

Nintendo 64. Overall: MEDIOCRE. Yes, cartridges never break, and load so much faster than CD games, but, ever noticed how hacked-up games ported from a CD system were for the N64? Exactly. And ever noticed how no N64 game ever looked as good as the best-looking PS1 games ever made? (Seriously, Goldeneye 007 cannot compare to Final Fantasy IX, both graphically, and gameplay-wise.) And the controller, oh my god, I have nightmares about that controller. If it wasn't for Mischief Makers, Ocarina of Time, and Banjo-Tooie, the N64 would've totally sucked.

Nintendo Gamecube. Overall: slightly better than the Sega Dreamcast. (See DC down below.) Uh, I don't own a Gamecube. All I know is its version of Sonic Adventure 2 runs better than the DC version. That's a plus.

Sega. At least we'll always remember you for Shenmue.

Genesis. Overall: OKAY. Sure, the graphics don't compare to SNES games, but those Genny games sure process a lot faster. It's too bad the system didn't have a 12-button controller like the SNES, otherwise, the console might've had a better chance after the release of Sonic & Knuckles.

Saturn. Overall: CRAP. Bear with me, I don't own a Saturn, but I've played a few games nonetheless. Picture this; a Saturn-exclusive is like a PS1-exclusive, except that it has slightly better graphics, and much, much, much slower gameplay. You're lucky to get 15 FPS on a Saturn game. The 2D games run great, though.

Dreamcast. Overall: GOOD. Sega's best console, so short-lived. It was the first game console that could actually do good 3D graphics. Its games were larger, more powerful, and yet, could not compete with the PS2. How unfortunate. It deserves better.

Sony. Honestly, our disc readers NEVER FAIL!

Original Playstation. (AKA PS1) Overall: CRAP. Insufferably long load times: check. 3D games that, with rare exception, look like shit, check. Extremely limited memory card space: check. (Okay, the DC was also guilty of this, but that's off the record.) My only guess as to why the PS1 reigned supreme was the controller. A lot of gamers must really like the Dualshock gamepad, but hey, I don't blame them. At least the 2D games look great.

Playstation 2. Overall: EXCELLENT. It's like Sony finally got everything right: great graphics, great sound, same great controller, and now games on DVD, which runs a hell-of-a-lot better than CD games! If it were not for one tragic shortcoming, (See Xbox down below.) This would be my favorite system of all time. Minus the SNES and PC, of course.

And now the others.

Mattel Intellivision. Overall: MEGACRAP. What was my dad thinking when he bought this!? Horrible controller, puketastic graphics, glitchy sound, countless bugs, how did this get to market!? Now you know why Mattel doesn't make game hardware anymore; their first attempt, albeit nearly 30 years ago, was a bad one, to say the least.

Magnavox Odyssey 2. Overall: TERRIBLE-LIKE-DID-THEY-EVEN-TEST-THIS-SHIT-BEFORE-IT-WAS-
SOLD-TERRIBLE. Ya know, videogames are a lot like movies. When the motion picture first came out, nobody regarded it as a serious artform. Everyone only thought of 'pictures' as novelties for Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton to indulge in. Funny how Hollywood nowadays commands more money and respect than most countries' GNP. Videogames also had a similar start. There was a time when 'television games' were nothing more than Pong machines in smoke-filled bars and game systems like the Odyssey and Odyssey 2. Still, Magnavox did start the trend of numbering its systems that later proved useful for Sony. But never forget our ancestors, gamers. Never forget that gaming at home took off not on the NES, but rather, on a hackjob port of Pac-Man for the Atari VCS. Or 2600. Depending on your region.

Microsoft Xbox. (NOT 360.) Overall: SUPERB. It's like the PS2, but with Xbox Live and, a built-in hard drive. Imagine if you will, a game console that can save large save files like a PC. "So. Why don't they just make a computer, then?" Because you have to install games on a PC to run them! But not so on a console, and if the 'box had the library of games the PS2 has, and the PS2's controller, the Xbox would be, the greatest game system evar. Alas, that is not the case. At the very least, the Xbox version of Psychonauts saves and loads faster than the PS2 version.

Still haven't played any of the new systems. I hear one of them uses wireless motion sensor controllers. What are they trying to do, turn your living room into an arcade?

LATE EDIT: Just a little note. PS3? Amazing.

Don't you mean Devil May Care?

I've only played one game in the Devil May Cry franchise; Devil May Cry 3: Special Edition. And yet, it is one of my favorite games of all time. About a year ago, I typed up a review of DMC3. This review will sum up my thoughts on the game:

There are times when you want to go on destructive rampages, times when you want to kill everything in sight, times when you just to open up a can of whoopass. And not just kill things, kill them in style, pulling off maneuvers impossible in the real world. Some videogames allow the player to do that. One videogame that truly embodies this concept of pure action is Capcom’s Devil May Cry 3 for the PS2.

DMC 3, like DMC 1 and DMC 2, is a throwback. It’s a throwback to when games didn’t have complicated narratives, didn’t have overly complex control schemes, and featured over-the-top heroes and villains fighting for who-knows-what. It’s a throwback to when the only objective in a game was, “Kill everything in the room before they kill you.” DMC 3 can be best described as a third-person shooter with fighting game mechanics. The hero is Dante, a half-human half-demon warrior who fights on behalf of humanity. His trademark weapons are the handguns Ebony and Ivory, which inexplicably never run out of ammo, never have to be reloaded, and can shoot as fast as you can press the trigger button. He also uses a number of other firearms, which also never run out of ammo, and various melee weapons, including swords, nunchuks, and an electric guitar that doubles as a scythe. The game is not without a sense of humor. Dante can equip two ranged weapons and two melee weapons at a time. He can also switch between a number of combat styles, one that specializes in evading enemies attacks, one that specializes in ranged attacks, one that specializes in melee attacks, and one that enables him to block and deflect attacks, among others. This, combined with his capacity to switch instantly between what weapon he can use allows for fight sequences that never get dull.

And the fights aren’t dull alright. Except on the ‘easy’ mode, you can’t win most battles by just mashing the attack buttons. You have to know your style’s nuances, you have to know what weapons to use, and you need quick reflexes. If you don’t learn how to dodge attacks, you’ll die very quickly. Luckily, Dante can accumulate combat experience for his combat styles, granting him new abilities, and he can also collect red orbs, which allow him to ‘purchase’ items and new powers. These upgrades carry on to replays on other difficulty levels. But don’t think you can ‘level up’ Dante to become god-like. The later stages are very challenging, even with the upgrades. You can’t beat DMC 3 without giving your best effort. This too is a throwback, to when most games were hard and required dedication to complete without resorting to cheat codes.

Dante himself is a throwback. His personality can be described as a cross between Duke Nukem and Sonic the Hedgehog. He’s a supernatural demonslayer and knows it. He enjoys pulling off crazy feats of wonder, laughing at the face of death, mocking the enemies of Hell. He speaks mostly in comic book one-liners, especially during the superbly directed cutscenes. The cutscenes are done entirely with in-game graphics, and sport beautiful animations. The characters are well-voiced, a surprise considering Capcom’s tendency for bad English voiceovers, and the audio during the cutscenes is comparable to a high budget movie in theaters. The soundtrack of the game captures the setting perfectly. During the cutscenes and during lulls between combat, the music is subtle, dark, Gothic, just like the game world. But whenever monsters are onscreen, the soundtrack seemlessly changes to heavy metal riffs; the Devil’s music if you will. It’s a good soundtrack, one that never sounds out of place.

On the Special Edtion of DMC 3, you can also play as Vergil, Dante’s twin brother. Despite looking nearly identical to Dante, Vergil is almost an exact opposite. He is cold, emotionless, and dedicated to his mission. It’s even reflective in his fighting style. Vergil is less focused on show, and more focused on deadliness. He doesn’t have as many weapons or styles as Dante, nor is he as agile as the man in red, but that’s because he doesn’t need to be. Vergil can be described as a power hitter, whereas Dante is a finesse warrior. Whoever is better is a matter of personal preference. Just know that having two playable characters adds replay value.

The Devil May Cry series has started a sub-genre of sorts; the third-person shooter/fighting action game. There are imitators of the DMC style, including Tecmo’s Ninja Gaiden for the Xbox, and Sony’s God of War for the PS2. But try as they might, they can’t compare to the special edition of Devil May Cry 3. DMC 3's control scheme is the best for this kind of game, and it oozes with a kind of style that was once everywhere in the videogame scene back in the early to mid ‘90's; over-the-top nihilism that is fun to not only watch, but to act out yourself. My only warning is you better have good hand-eye coordination and a stomach for bloodshed, because DMC 3 pulls no punches.

The apostrophes and quotation marks look different than usual 'cause I copied and pasted from a Wordperfect article, but there you have it; DMC 3, starring Dante, one of my favorite heroes of all time. Oh, you know how I mentioned God of War briefly? The two games may have similar gameplay, but very different, shall I say, enjoyability. If the two games were aromas, it would be like this:

"Hey, what's that smell? Smells nice." "That's Devil May Cry 3, an awesome game." "Wow. Smells like springtime blossoms. I like it."

(sometime later.)

"Eww, what's that stench?" "That's God of War, a PS2-exclusive that doesn't live up to any of the hype." "Good GOD what a steaming pile! Get that shit outta here!"

The more you know.

LATE EDIT: The first God of War was too hard and too shallow for my liking. There.

Super Elric Bros.

Fullmetal Alchemist. Those words are music to my ears. I love Fullmetal Alchemist. I love it like a shopaholic loves payday. FMA is my zen.

I am familiar with the tv series, (or 'anime' for you psycho whores of Japanese culture.) the comic series, (or 'manga' for . . . you know what I mean.) and one of the videogames. The PS2 FMA game I played sucked, but I really liked the tv series. The show was my introduction to FMA, and man, what an introduction. The first thing I noticed was the dubbing was not a hackjob. They actually sounded, good. Compared to Pokemon, the dubbing was godlike. And not only that, I was really impressed with the depth of the characters that are Edward and Alphonse. And the setting, a setting fully realized, and the concept of alchemy; everything blew me away! That was, until I read the graphic novels . . .

. . . Only to be blown away again! The writing was even sharper, the characterization even deeper, the timeline even longer! The FMA comic series is one of the greatest works of literature in human history. I have read volumes 1 through 10 thus far, and even then, I can't get enough. I have an addiction; an addiction to FMA fiction. Someone help me.

However, while overall I prefer the manga series, the anime series actually has some advantages over the manga series. For example, the fight scenes look better. There's music, and pretty good music I might add. I like the anime portrayals of Lt. Col. Maes Hughes and Rose more than their manga portrayals, but there is only one interesting anime-only character; Dante. Which is not as many as the interesting manga-only characters.

Now, the manga lasts longer than the anime series. (51 episodes plus 1 movie vs. 7o-something chapters and counting.) The artwork is bloodier, more visceral. I like the manga portrayals of Lt. Hawkeye, Paninya, Barry the Chopper, Fuhrer Bradley, Shou Tucker, and the Homunculi more than their anime portrayals. Also, the manga has "Father," Lin Yao, and May Chang. (May's so cute! She's my 3rd favorite character behind Ed and Al.) And the "omake" sections at the end of each book are a hoot. But regardless, both versions are great.

Say, the title of this entry is "Super Elric Bros." If I had the skills, I'd make a series of pictures using graphics from the old NES version of Super Mario Bros. 1, and show an 8-bit Edward struggling ever so much to jump up and reach the blocks. Alas, though, he is too short, and can't reach. Then I'd show another panel of someone saying, "Wow! You're so short, you can't even reach the blocks!" Which of course would prompt what I call an Edward Moment(tm). The next panel would show him with his teeth jagged, shouting, "AAAGGGHHHH!!!!! DON'T CALL ME SHORT!!!! I'M NOT SHORT!!!!! AAAGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!" Oh well, at least he'll always have his alchemy and his dashing good looks.

Oh, FYI, I've read some volumes of the Trigun manga. I've never seen the anime, but I know a little about the manga and its sequel, Trigun Maximum. I can some them up in three words: It. Sucks. BALLS.

LATE EDIT: Yeah, this was obviously before I read the later volumes, and learned that Arakawa's portrayal of Rose and Hughes still made more sense than the older anime version's. Hey, fancy that; FMAB didn't exist when I first wrote this. Weird.

But yeah, I still think the Trigun manga sucks.

It's superbowl sunday. WHOO-PIH-DEE-DOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

The latest Superbowl is happening right now in America. This is a national holiday here, a holiday I don't celebrate. Sure, sporting events can be entertaining, but honestly, I could care less about a bunch of strangers throwing a football around, all accompanied by lameass beer commercials that stopped being funny 10 years ago.

You know what? There are better things to do than watch the Superbowl. I would know; I haven't watched a superbowl game in 6 years, and still going strong! In fact, let me draw up a list right now.

Things you could be doing instead of watching the Superbowl that are more constructive:

-Walking around the park.

-Taking a warm, soothing bath.

-Replaying Tales of the Abyss.

-Writing a novella. (Homestar reference!)

-Going to the library.

-Talking to a friend. About something other than the superbowl.

-Downloading free (legal) games.

-Studying for your mid-terms.

-Writing an article about how bad the PS1/Saturn/N64 generation of console games were. (Coincidentally, many of the best PC games came out during this epoch.)

-Reading this blog.

You see, there's so many other things you could be doing with your lives, instead of watching a pointless, overhyped sporting event. Wake me up when the madness ends.

What's up and what's down

What, me? You want to know more about me? You're not some kinda stalker, are you? Okay then.

I'm a college student. I'm in a community college, and as such, I don't have a declared major, yet. My current major is listed as English, since I love to write. I am currently unemployed, and live with my parents. But once I'm finished with college and get me a good career, that will change.

Other things, I like videogames. And I like comic books. I also like regular books. Why? Because they are mindless diversions, and I like mindless diversions.

Also, this blog, since it comes from me, contains absolutely no bullshit whatsoever. (I make no guarantees to that claim.) I will not lie about my feelings for anything, I will not put a spin on anything, all you get from me is the honest to god truth, as I see it. There's a wide range of subjects I want to talk about, some of which are subjects nobody wants to talk about. Look forward to that.

Oh, also, there will be no celebrity gossip here. Then again, I don't really care about most celebrities in the first place. See!? I just gave you the straight dope!

Maybe tomorrow I'll have a more interesting article to write. Maybe. By the way, I know most people who read this will already agree with me, but this is aimed at anyone I knew back in high school: The O.C. was an intolerable, deplorable mess that didn't deserve to survive beyond the pilot. Yeah, suck it, O.C. fans!

LATE EDIT: I eventually went with English, but I couldn't get a BA like my parents wanted, so I got an AA instead. Keep in mind, most people in the country don't have any degree in English, yet I do.

Everybody's Gotta Start Somewhere

Hello, internet. Welcome to xm0123's Domain, home of the depraved . . . just kidding. This is a blog about my life: past, present and future. Who am I? I am xm0123. I am, a guy. I live, somewhere, on the planet Earth. I am, young, older than a teenager, but younger than 25. Yes, this blog will contain personal information about me, but I know better than to reveal my real name and other information about myself. Think you're so smart, huh online con artists!?

If you are reading this, you must've followed my link from my tvtropes profile page. I have been to many places on the intarwebz, but tvtropes is somewhere on my top five favorites list. Make no mistake.

Oh, also, since I wield absolute power here, I have established a rule; NO COMMENTS. The reason for this is I don't want my blog to become vandalized by asinine comments like, "LOL! UR SUCH A FAAAAAAAG!!!!!!1" If you want to contact me, do it over tvtropes. I accept emails and private messages. You can't contact me over this blog, only on tvtropes.

Now then, if you don't know much about me, here's something about me; I am opinionated. The reason I am opinionated is because I can think for myself. People who can think for themselves tend to form a lot of opinions, usually their own opinions. However, over the years I have become notorious: notorious for holding; unpopular opinions. Here's something that will distinguish my blog from all the others; in every entry I make, I will list an opinion of my own that most people, may disagree with. Either in short passing or in great detail, it will happen at least once every time. My therapist says it's good for me to release in such a manner. And you'd be surprised as to whom my therapist is, but that's an entry for another day.

So everybody, welcome. Welcome, to xm0123's Domain. By the way, today's groundhog day. Why am I thinking about Bill Murray all of a sudden?

P.S. The first Metal Gear Solid sucks. Piss on you, PS1 'classic'!

P.P.S. This article has been edited. Last edited on January 19th, 2009. Retcon for the win!

LATE EDIT: This article was later edited shortly before I started my career. I didn't keep up to my promise for too long. Either that, or listing unpopular opinions of mine happens unconsciously.

But I still think MSG1 is one of the most overrated games ever! Hey, that would make a good youtube rant . . .