(Copied and pasted from a Wordperfect article.)
Hey kids, ever watched a movie where, when you get to the end, you are neither happy for the heroes, depressed because the bad guys won, or simply thought, “wow, what a good movie!” but rather, you have a completely puzzled expression on your face, you stare at the screen not saying a word, and then ask yourself, “What just happened?”
This is what happens when you experience a movie, novel, or videogame afflicted with Evangelion Syndrome.
What is Evangelion Syndrome? Simply put, Evangelion Syndrome is when a creative artist deliberately makes a work of art as confusing as possible, believing that utter nonsense equals good storytelling. In other words, it’s when the whole point of a movie, game, or serial is NOTHING IS SUPPOSED TO MAKE ANY SENSE!!!!! No matter how often these works are analyzed, scrutinized, and televised, no one can ever figure out everything that happens, not even the original author(s).
Evangelion Syndrome gets its name from Neon Genesis Evangelion, a comic book series from Japan that also had an animated tv show adaptation which took over Japan’s pop-culture during the 1990's. Evangelion was not the first work of science fiction to be as deliberately confusing as possible, but it was the first one that was a huge hit, the first one that legitimatized the art of making peoples’ heads explode from trying to decipher what happens. Given that Evangelion was popular only in Japan, it’s no surprise that many other works with Evangelion Syndrome also come from Japanese authors. However, this is not to say Evangelion Syndrome is endemic only to the Land of the Rising Sun. Many other authors the world over are also guilty of creating something with Evangelion Syndrome.
Now, an observant reader might say, “Hey, wait a minute. Science fiction has always been confusing. That’s what sets sci-fi apart from ordinary fi, that nothing is ever as it seems in sci-fi! That’s why it’s called science fiction; because it’s probing the unknown and trying to understand how it works, just like science!” And you would be correct. Science fiction has always carried an air of mystery around it. We never figure out just how that rock creature in the original Star Trek series was able to conjure a facsimile of Abraham Lincoln, for example. Sometimes, also, stories are written in ways that you must experience them multiple times to figure them out. I couldn’t understand the ending to Star Ocean: Till the End of Time when I first saw it, but after reviewing some information and seeing it again, I came to understand what happened in the game’s finale. That’s not what I mean.
Evangelion Syndrome makes it so that even if you do try to come to your own conclusions, your own hypotheses will not any sense whatsoever, because the universe of that story is just too out there to properly comprehend without the aid of pharmaceuticals. Here now is a list of a few works of fiction that have Evangelion Syndrome. Please note that Evangelion Syndrome can also afflict stories that aren’t science fiction:
Neon Genesis Evangelion, the comic series and the tv series and the movie series, and hence who the syndrome is named after.
Xenogears, the PS1 cult-favorite.
Wild Arms 4, a PS2 game that, soundtrack notwithstanding, makes me hurl.
The Xenosaga series. Xenogears and the Xenosaga series were written and directed by the same director. Not surprising.
The Matrix franchise. The most popular example.
Kingdom Hearts II. A Disney game for the PS2 that, story-wise, strayed from the basic yet understandable roots of the original.
Princess Mononoke; AKA, Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind redone to make absolutely no sense at all. What was Miyazaki-san thinking!?
FLCL: Good luck trying to make any sense of this straight-to-video miniseries.
These are but a few examples. There are some series that make no sense at all, no matter how much they are analyzed, but don’t have Evangelion Syndrome. A good example is the Dragonball franchise. Much of what happens in Dragonball, and its sequel Dragonball Z, makes no sense at all, but that is because they were written in a very sloppy manner. Works with Evangelion Syndrome are written by competent authors who chose to make their works confusing.
Now then, products of Evangelion Syndrome have a few common symptoms which I will list now:
-There are scenes that cannot be explained in words. “Okay, so there’s this android chick, right? And she’s fighting all of these aliens that can’t die, right? And then all of a sudden, her torso opens up, right? And her torso opening starts to suck in space, like a vacuum, right? And then all of the unkillable aliens all get sucked in, and disappear. A definitive example of a deus ex machina if I do say so myself.” I still can’t figure out how “the android chick from Xenosaga” can do that.
-A large amount of philosophy is injected into the characters’ dialogue, philosophy which adds nothing to the plot, nor furthers any characterization, but rather, is just there. See for example nearly every scene in the Matrix: Reloaded. In professional critiquing fields, this is known as “Card Tricks in the Dark.” You do a bunch of fancy tricks with playing cards, yet no one sees it, and therefore, it is unnecessary.
-There is a large number of religious symbology that reoccurs throughout the series, which, like the needless philosophizing, adds nothing to the actual plot. Everyone loves throwing crucifixes and angels everywhere, as if it were window dressing. Another example of a card trick done in total darkness.
-The ol’ bait ‘n switch: The author(s) promise something by hooking you in with a plot point,(the bait) but by the climax of said plot point, the author(s) move on to something else. (The switch.) Example, in the Matrix Reloaded: it was revealed that Agent Smith broke free of the will of the Machines. The film didn’t show how he did it. It was assumed that this would be explained in the Matrix Revolutions. Well, one movie and two videogames later, and we STILL don’t know how Agent Smith did it.
Of course, products afflicted with Evangelion Syndrome don’t necessarily “suck.” The Evangelion tv series is a decent action/drama series with its moments, The first Matrix movie also has its moments, Xenosaga III is one of my favorite PS2-exclusive games, and Kingdom Hearts II is a very fun game to play. However, this syndrome has prevented each of these franchises from achieving storytelling brilliance.
In the long scheme of things, a tv show or movie or game whose primary purpose is to screw with your mind isn’t going to affect human society that much. At worst, you’ll only suffer a headache, and probably ask for a refund. Still, when I want to unwind from a hard day of work, I want to ingest a story that won’t make me befuddled on top of exhausted and stressed out from work. And also, this article exists as a warning. To inspiring novelists, DON’T MAKE A PLOTLINE DELIBERATELY CONFUSING AS POSSIBLE. You will turn off more consumers than you will turn on.
(end article.)
So, in the future, if I say I didn't like something because it had Evangelion Syndrome, well, now you know what I'm talking about.
LATE EDIT: Oh wait. Someone already beat me to an article about Evangelion Syndrome. They just call it a mindscrew instead. Same thing, though.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Saturday, April 26, 2008
PRINNY RAID!!!
So, as you probably guessed, I'm still playing Disgaea 2. Love it, love it, love it! And I indulged in something else today to commemorate the start of my vacation.
I watched The Incredibles.
I rented it along with Disgaea 2 for I haven't seen The Incredibles since it first came out on video. This marked my second time seeing the film, and I must say, the Incredible is really good, even by Pixar standards. But, if you own the movie, you need to see the shorts on disc 2. The ones related to the movie are hilarious, ("No, it's thanks to you, Frozone, and democracy!") and the short entitled Boundin' is sweet, and very endearing. But every time, I laugh my ass off every time the movie makes fun of villains who engage in "monologing." I swear, every single comic book and videogame villain in existence is a chronic monologer.
Also readers, I am saving up money. For yet another PS2-only stat-based roleplaying game. I hear it's only thirty bucks, and everyone's sayin' it's gonna be the PS2's last best game.
I'm saving up money for Persona 3: FES.
I know nothing about the franchise, but everyone everywhere acts like this game is a modern classic. Is it, really? I wanna find out.
In the meantime, I'm still playing Disgaea 2. This game is the best "strategy RPG" I've ever played. And also the funniest. Let me mention one last thing, though.
I've noticed that a large number of shows, movies, and games that have been released in America from Japan over the last decade or so tend to use the same actors and actresses for the voices. I can recognize several of these dub superstars, if you will. I recognized a few when I saw Code Geass yesterday. I immediately recognized Crispin Freeman (AKA Albedo from Xenosaga.) playing a mecha pilot. I recognized Liam O'Brien (AKA, Gaara from Naruto.) playing what looked like a scientist. Also, I didn't recognize the voice of Lelouch at first, but towards the end of the episode, I thought, "hey, he kinda sounds like Johnny Yong Bosch." When the credits roll, surprise surprise, JYB played the voice of the main protagonist. When I saw that, my expression was, "DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
It was the most fun I had watching Code Geass. "What, naming off the actors?" Yes.
I watched The Incredibles.
I rented it along with Disgaea 2 for I haven't seen The Incredibles since it first came out on video. This marked my second time seeing the film, and I must say, the Incredible is really good, even by Pixar standards. But, if you own the movie, you need to see the shorts on disc 2. The ones related to the movie are hilarious, ("No, it's thanks to you, Frozone, and democracy!") and the short entitled Boundin' is sweet, and very endearing. But every time, I laugh my ass off every time the movie makes fun of villains who engage in "monologing." I swear, every single comic book and videogame villain in existence is a chronic monologer.
Also readers, I am saving up money. For yet another PS2-only stat-based roleplaying game. I hear it's only thirty bucks, and everyone's sayin' it's gonna be the PS2's last best game.
I'm saving up money for Persona 3: FES.
I know nothing about the franchise, but everyone everywhere acts like this game is a modern classic. Is it, really? I wanna find out.
In the meantime, I'm still playing Disgaea 2. This game is the best "strategy RPG" I've ever played. And also the funniest. Let me mention one last thing, though.
I've noticed that a large number of shows, movies, and games that have been released in America from Japan over the last decade or so tend to use the same actors and actresses for the voices. I can recognize several of these dub superstars, if you will. I recognized a few when I saw Code Geass yesterday. I immediately recognized Crispin Freeman (AKA Albedo from Xenosaga.) playing a mecha pilot. I recognized Liam O'Brien (AKA, Gaara from Naruto.) playing what looked like a scientist. Also, I didn't recognize the voice of Lelouch at first, but towards the end of the episode, I thought, "hey, he kinda sounds like Johnny Yong Bosch." When the credits roll, surprise surprise, JYB played the voice of the main protagonist. When I saw that, my expression was, "DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
It was the most fun I had watching Code Geass. "What, naming off the actors?" Yes.
Friday, April 25, 2008
N For Near
Oh, you just knew I was gonna make a reference to Death Note in the title, didn't you? But before I discuss some, uh, new content on Adult Swim, let's examine why I haven't posted for a while, even though I finished the semester yesterday.
Answer; I rented Disgaea 2. Haven't played it in nearly a year. This game is hilarious, and really fun. And also, Etna has the best evil girl laugh ever. The. Best.
I've been so occupied with Disgaea 2, I haven't been able to keep in contact with you people. It really sucks the time away.
Now then, I got off Adult Swim's website not too long ago. I saw the latest Death Note, thrilling as always, even though the series is supposed to "suck" at this point in the timeline. I never realized one could eat chocolate bars with such visual panache. You learn something new, everyday.
And they also have the English dubbed premiere of an anime series entitled Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion. I saw the first episode. Here's what I think:
There was a time in my life, my late teen years. Every anime I had watched at that time sucked. Sucked, BALLS. I couldn't tolerate them anymore. And I sure-as-Hell couldn't tolerate the retarded asshole anime fans either, both in real life, and on the internet. I wanted nothing in common with them, so, when I was 17, I vowed never to indulge in anything anime-related that wasn't an anime videogame, (Hey, I like Chrono Trigger and the original Megaman series. Can I be faulted for that?) for either the rest of my life, or until Japan finally released an anime in America that didn't make me cringe with rancor.
I stayed anime-free (barring anime games, of course.) until I was 21, just last year. I discovered a Fullmetal Alchemist rerun, and, since everyone I knew on the internet declared FMA to be awesome, I watched it. It was refreshing to see Japanese animation again, especially since FMA is, ya know, actually good. So now, the moratorium was, and remains lifted. However, I don't regret my avoiding anime for four years. Even though I missed out on Cowboy bebop, Ghost in the Shell, and the Miyazaki movies in doing so, I felt better watching Futurama instead of fucking Yu-Gi-Oh.
I performed this anime moratorium in the first place to avoid shows like Code Geass. First of all, the entire plot is lifted PIECEMEAL from V for Vendetta, and though I liked the V movie, I wouldn't consider it a classic. (Haven't read the V graphic novel though.) Secondly, I have a hard time taking the characters seriously what with how over-exaggerated their voices were. Thirdly, the whole show just moves too fast. Everything happens too quickly. My brain doesn't have time to analyze everything with what's going on. Also, the artwork rips off nearly every anime series from the '90's, which, I don't know about you, but I consider the '90's to be a dark age for Japanese animation. It's just some generic action show with tons of violence and countless anime trappings, not to mention stealing an idea from a popular graphic novel and movie. Hey, at least the V for Vendetta movie had that side story about that woman who was shaken down because of her lesbian relationships. This Code Geass, has nothing I want to see on a Friday afternoon. Naruto is better than this. Bleach is better than this. The Big O is better than this, and I didn't even like The Big O! File this under "lost my interest after one episode."
This review's gotten me in a bad mood. Now I need to play more Disgaea 2. Oh lift my spirits up, Demon Lord Etna. Wait, shouldn't that be Demon Lady Etna, 'cause she's a girl? Oh whatever.
Answer; I rented Disgaea 2. Haven't played it in nearly a year. This game is hilarious, and really fun. And also, Etna has the best evil girl laugh ever. The. Best.
I've been so occupied with Disgaea 2, I haven't been able to keep in contact with you people. It really sucks the time away.
Now then, I got off Adult Swim's website not too long ago. I saw the latest Death Note, thrilling as always, even though the series is supposed to "suck" at this point in the timeline. I never realized one could eat chocolate bars with such visual panache. You learn something new, everyday.
And they also have the English dubbed premiere of an anime series entitled Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion. I saw the first episode. Here's what I think:
There was a time in my life, my late teen years. Every anime I had watched at that time sucked. Sucked, BALLS. I couldn't tolerate them anymore. And I sure-as-Hell couldn't tolerate the retarded asshole anime fans either, both in real life, and on the internet. I wanted nothing in common with them, so, when I was 17, I vowed never to indulge in anything anime-related that wasn't an anime videogame, (Hey, I like Chrono Trigger and the original Megaman series. Can I be faulted for that?) for either the rest of my life, or until Japan finally released an anime in America that didn't make me cringe with rancor.
I stayed anime-free (barring anime games, of course.) until I was 21, just last year. I discovered a Fullmetal Alchemist rerun, and, since everyone I knew on the internet declared FMA to be awesome, I watched it. It was refreshing to see Japanese animation again, especially since FMA is, ya know, actually good. So now, the moratorium was, and remains lifted. However, I don't regret my avoiding anime for four years. Even though I missed out on Cowboy bebop, Ghost in the Shell, and the Miyazaki movies in doing so, I felt better watching Futurama instead of fucking Yu-Gi-Oh.
I performed this anime moratorium in the first place to avoid shows like Code Geass. First of all, the entire plot is lifted PIECEMEAL from V for Vendetta, and though I liked the V movie, I wouldn't consider it a classic. (Haven't read the V graphic novel though.) Secondly, I have a hard time taking the characters seriously what with how over-exaggerated their voices were. Thirdly, the whole show just moves too fast. Everything happens too quickly. My brain doesn't have time to analyze everything with what's going on. Also, the artwork rips off nearly every anime series from the '90's, which, I don't know about you, but I consider the '90's to be a dark age for Japanese animation. It's just some generic action show with tons of violence and countless anime trappings, not to mention stealing an idea from a popular graphic novel and movie. Hey, at least the V for Vendetta movie had that side story about that woman who was shaken down because of her lesbian relationships. This Code Geass, has nothing I want to see on a Friday afternoon. Naruto is better than this. Bleach is better than this. The Big O is better than this, and I didn't even like The Big O! File this under "lost my interest after one episode."
This review's gotten me in a bad mood. Now I need to play more Disgaea 2. Oh lift my spirits up, Demon Lord Etna. Wait, shouldn't that be Demon Lady Etna, 'cause she's a girl? Oh whatever.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tales of the Hopelessly Deranged
It's been a year-and-a-half since the last time I played a new (for me) Tales game. My supressed inner Tales fanboy has been unleashed and is about to wreak havoc on this blog right about
HAIL MARTEL!!!!!
Now. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Greetings, world! I'm back! Why is this place named "xm0123's Domain"? Blasphemy! It should named after someone more grandiose, more fitting for a person like me. It should be something like Chester's Domain, or Lloyd's Domain, or Guy's Domain. Okay, those are rather generic sounding names, and I've never even played Tales of Symphonia so I'm surprised at my own knowledge of said game, but whatever!
There's something amiss about Tales of Eternia. Oh don't get me wrong, I am enjoying it, however, something's missing. TOE's story is . . . lightweight. It's basically this: [Main hero] Let's beat up some monsters! [Rest of party] Okay! *go dungeon crawling forever* It's really basic, kinda like the earlier Dragons Quest games . . . or the first Kingdom Hearts. COME AND GET ME, SQUARE-ENIX LOYALISTS!!!!!!! On the plus side, people often complain that too many RPG characters are depressing, "emo", and nearly as rotten as the villains, if not more. TOE is not like that. All your heroes are a lively, optimistic bunch . . . and also have as much character growth as is typical of an average Mario game, but since I don't care about story in games, that doesn't affect me! So long a game isn't a full-blooded adventure game a la Monkey Island, I don't care!
However, I do hope that TOE's ending has more resolution than the Ending for Tales of Legendia. Man, talk about letdown. TOL did try to tell a real story with real dialogue and a few awesome characters. But still, even with cool characters like Chloe Valens and Jay the Unseen, that was offset by Norma "Look at me! I'm a bastardized Yuffie/Selphie/Rikku rolled into one!" Beatty, and a Mary Sue who doubled as "moe" fanbait. That's too bad. I really wanted to like TOL. Alas, we were not meant to be.
In other news, did you know there's a sequel to TOS coming out for the Wii? And did you know there's a brand new Tales game coming out for the 360? Two systems I don't own! *insert unintelligible grunts of frustration* What must I do!?
Well, if I can never play those games, at least I'll die happy, after having played Tales of Phantasia and Tales of the Abyss. Those games are gold, world! GOLD!
"Is he gone?"
HAIL MARTEL!!!!!
Now. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Greetings, world! I'm back! Why is this place named "xm0123's Domain"? Blasphemy! It should named after someone more grandiose, more fitting for a person like me. It should be something like Chester's Domain, or Lloyd's Domain, or Guy's Domain. Okay, those are rather generic sounding names, and I've never even played Tales of Symphonia so I'm surprised at my own knowledge of said game, but whatever!
There's something amiss about Tales of Eternia. Oh don't get me wrong, I am enjoying it, however, something's missing. TOE's story is . . . lightweight. It's basically this: [Main hero] Let's beat up some monsters! [Rest of party] Okay! *go dungeon crawling forever* It's really basic, kinda like the earlier Dragons Quest games . . . or the first Kingdom Hearts. COME AND GET ME, SQUARE-ENIX LOYALISTS!!!!!!! On the plus side, people often complain that too many RPG characters are depressing, "emo", and nearly as rotten as the villains, if not more. TOE is not like that. All your heroes are a lively, optimistic bunch . . . and also have as much character growth as is typical of an average Mario game, but since I don't care about story in games, that doesn't affect me! So long a game isn't a full-blooded adventure game a la Monkey Island, I don't care!
However, I do hope that TOE's ending has more resolution than the Ending for Tales of Legendia. Man, talk about letdown. TOL did try to tell a real story with real dialogue and a few awesome characters. But still, even with cool characters like Chloe Valens and Jay the Unseen, that was offset by Norma "Look at me! I'm a bastardized Yuffie/Selphie/Rikku rolled into one!" Beatty, and a Mary Sue who doubled as "moe" fanbait. That's too bad. I really wanted to like TOL. Alas, we were not meant to be.
In other news, did you know there's a sequel to TOS coming out for the Wii? And did you know there's a brand new Tales game coming out for the 360? Two systems I don't own! *insert unintelligible grunts of frustration* What must I do!?
Well, if I can never play those games, at least I'll die happy, after having played Tales of Phantasia and Tales of the Abyss. Those games are gold, world! GOLD!
"Is he gone?"
I'm 'voicing' my opinion, get it?
I couldn't contain myself, dear internet. I couldn't wait 'til tomorrow afternoon to go to the video store. I went ahead and downloaded another PS1 game to play.
I got Tales of Eternia.
Or "Tales of Destiny 2", since Namco at the time thought us Americans wouldn't know any better. Now, before I go on, you need to understand, the Tales of series is one I adore. I have played four Tales games, including Eternia, and although it's too soon to say what I feel about TOE, I can tell you about how I feel about Tales of Phantasia for the SNES, Tales of Legendia and Tales of the Abyss for the PS2. Now, I don't love all of these games, but they inspire more passion than most other games I've played. Observe:
TOP: LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!!!! ^_^ JUST LOVE!!!!! The music! The story! The game itself! And Arche Klaine! I love it all!!!!!!!!
TOL: Lame. This is like a lame iteration of TOP. Lame gameplay, lame music, lame voices. The story was promising, but fell apart at the end. So disappointing. And . . . don't tell anyone, but I really wanted Senel and Chloe to end up together. What's a SenLoe fan like me to do?
TOTA: SWEET GAMING BLISS! This is the Tales I love! Fun battles, great characters, funny dialogue. Oh sure, the story is a little on the complex side, but I don't care! In fact, if Final Fantasy 10 and Devil May Cry 3 didn't exist, TOTA would be my favorite PS2-exclusive game. It's the truth! All hail Jade Curtiss!
So, yeah, I think I get excited over Tales games the same way most RPG fanatics get excited over FF games, except my excitement seems to be misplaced. Just look into my own past:
(sometime in 2006.)
[Random RPG nut] Did you hear!? FF12 is finally coming out! And it's coming to America for the holidays!
[Me] Really? That's nice. Maybe I'll rent it.
[Random RPG nut] Oh, and also, Tales of the Abyss is gonna come out in America later this year too-
[ME] ZOMG!!!! Seriously!?!?!? I wonder if it'll be like TOP! Now I gotta save up money! I must play this game!!!
[Random RPG nut] . . . . fanboy.
Uh, let's get back to TOE.
TOE plays like TOP, except it has an ismotetric perspective, and you can move in eight directions. Except for the world map and some spell effects, the graphics are in 2D, and my gosh, are they beautiful. It's like TOP but with a richer color scheme and more fluid animations! Man, why couldn't developers see that the original Playstation was meant for 2d games, not 3d? Oh, no matter.
The battle system is like the one in TOP, but more forgiving. You can string together attacks, hit aerial enemies, block physical attacks, and use magic and special techniques without having the game pause like in TOP. Not as refined as later games, but I like it. Hint: mash the X button repeatedly to win.
The music is decent, and also, you can turn off the voices, and you'll want to because the characters' voices are audible during the battles AND during more important scenes. Uh, how should I describe the acting quality . . . . uh, it's one step above Megaman 8, and one step below Sonic Adventure. TOE's voices sound worse than TOL's! Oh, the agony!
Of course, I know it's not always the actors' fault. Sometimes, it's the fault of the director. Sometimes it's the fault of the script writers. Sometimes, the production was just rushed. Whatever the case, I, myself, who is not an actor by trade, can do a better voice of Reid, the main protagonist, than the one heard in the game. And now begins my rant:
You kids these days are so spoiled, what with your Disgaea and your Psychonauts and your Dragon Quest 8 and your Grand Theft Auto and your Knights of the Old Republic. Okay, most games still don't have fantastic voices, but these days, games with decent voices are the norm, and games with bad voices are the exception. Back in the '90's, the ONLY games with good voice-acting were the LucasArts adventure games, Metal Gear Solid, and the Megaman Legends games. That was IT! I still wonder how gamers tolerated it back then. How?
And that's all I have to 'voice' today, audience.
I got Tales of Eternia.
Or "Tales of Destiny 2", since Namco at the time thought us Americans wouldn't know any better. Now, before I go on, you need to understand, the Tales of series is one I adore. I have played four Tales games, including Eternia, and although it's too soon to say what I feel about TOE, I can tell you about how I feel about Tales of Phantasia for the SNES, Tales of Legendia and Tales of the Abyss for the PS2. Now, I don't love all of these games, but they inspire more passion than most other games I've played. Observe:
TOP: LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!!!! ^_^ JUST LOVE!!!!! The music! The story! The game itself! And Arche Klaine! I love it all!!!!!!!!
TOL: Lame. This is like a lame iteration of TOP. Lame gameplay, lame music, lame voices. The story was promising, but fell apart at the end. So disappointing. And . . . don't tell anyone, but I really wanted Senel and Chloe to end up together. What's a SenLoe fan like me to do?
TOTA: SWEET GAMING BLISS! This is the Tales I love! Fun battles, great characters, funny dialogue. Oh sure, the story is a little on the complex side, but I don't care! In fact, if Final Fantasy 10 and Devil May Cry 3 didn't exist, TOTA would be my favorite PS2-exclusive game. It's the truth! All hail Jade Curtiss!
So, yeah, I think I get excited over Tales games the same way most RPG fanatics get excited over FF games, except my excitement seems to be misplaced. Just look into my own past:
(sometime in 2006.)
[Random RPG nut] Did you hear!? FF12 is finally coming out! And it's coming to America for the holidays!
[Me] Really? That's nice. Maybe I'll rent it.
[Random RPG nut] Oh, and also, Tales of the Abyss is gonna come out in America later this year too-
[ME] ZOMG!!!! Seriously!?!?!? I wonder if it'll be like TOP! Now I gotta save up money! I must play this game!!!
[Random RPG nut] . . . . fanboy.
Uh, let's get back to TOE.
TOE plays like TOP, except it has an ismotetric perspective, and you can move in eight directions. Except for the world map and some spell effects, the graphics are in 2D, and my gosh, are they beautiful. It's like TOP but with a richer color scheme and more fluid animations! Man, why couldn't developers see that the original Playstation was meant for 2d games, not 3d? Oh, no matter.
The battle system is like the one in TOP, but more forgiving. You can string together attacks, hit aerial enemies, block physical attacks, and use magic and special techniques without having the game pause like in TOP. Not as refined as later games, but I like it. Hint: mash the X button repeatedly to win.
The music is decent, and also, you can turn off the voices, and you'll want to because the characters' voices are audible during the battles AND during more important scenes. Uh, how should I describe the acting quality . . . . uh, it's one step above Megaman 8, and one step below Sonic Adventure. TOE's voices sound worse than TOL's! Oh, the agony!
Of course, I know it's not always the actors' fault. Sometimes, it's the fault of the director. Sometimes it's the fault of the script writers. Sometimes, the production was just rushed. Whatever the case, I, myself, who is not an actor by trade, can do a better voice of Reid, the main protagonist, than the one heard in the game. And now begins my rant:
You kids these days are so spoiled, what with your Disgaea and your Psychonauts and your Dragon Quest 8 and your Grand Theft Auto and your Knights of the Old Republic. Okay, most games still don't have fantastic voices, but these days, games with decent voices are the norm, and games with bad voices are the exception. Back in the '90's, the ONLY games with good voice-acting were the LucasArts adventure games, Metal Gear Solid, and the Megaman Legends games. That was IT! I still wonder how gamers tolerated it back then. How?
And that's all I have to 'voice' today, audience.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
And just like that, he's stuck again!
Dude, I don't even wanna imagine how long I have to power level in Xenogears to get past the boss I'm stuck on now.
Ya know what? I'll just wait 'til Thursday. The video store I go to still has PS2 games for rent. Maybe I'll look into that. And if there's no games to rent, then it's time to go looking for PS1 ISOs again! Heh heh heh!
Okay, I'm sounding too positive right now. I need to hate on something. And I know just what to hate. Well, okay, it's not something I outright hate, but I need to seriously bash this something. A lot of you are gonna cry foul for what I'm about to say, but I have to say it for your own good.
I did not like Princess Mononoke.
It's so weird, I like all of Miyazaki's movies, except for Princess Mononoke. Here's a good description of PM: PM is a remake of Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind. It's just like Nasuicaa, except NOTHING MAKES ANY GODDAMN SENSE WHATSOEVER! I swear! By the end of the movie, I didn't know what to feel. I just stared at the tv, dumbfounded, with a puzzled expression on my face, not to mention a massive headache, and asked in a flat voice, "What just happened?" This is not the Miyazaki I know. The Miyazaki I know puts out movies that you thoroughly enjoy, have characters you fall in love with, make you think all the little things in life, and basically make you think, "Wow, what a good movie!" Princess Mononoke fails to do those things! Oh sure, it looks better than most other anime works from the time, and it does have good music, but that can't cover the mess of a film PM is. And yet, everywhere I go, people, including complete whores of Japanese culture, and "real" anime fans who act like only they know what's best, orgy over this film for reasons and logic that escape me! Why!? WHY!?
Granted, PM is not as much of a trainwreck as nearly every other anime that got dumped into America during the '90's, but it was still a major letdown. But hey, I only rented it; I didn't buy it.
Try before you buy . . . it's a lifesaver.
Ya know what? I'll just wait 'til Thursday. The video store I go to still has PS2 games for rent. Maybe I'll look into that. And if there's no games to rent, then it's time to go looking for PS1 ISOs again! Heh heh heh!
Okay, I'm sounding too positive right now. I need to hate on something. And I know just what to hate. Well, okay, it's not something I outright hate, but I need to seriously bash this something. A lot of you are gonna cry foul for what I'm about to say, but I have to say it for your own good.
I did not like Princess Mononoke.
It's so weird, I like all of Miyazaki's movies, except for Princess Mononoke. Here's a good description of PM: PM is a remake of Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind. It's just like Nasuicaa, except NOTHING MAKES ANY GODDAMN SENSE WHATSOEVER! I swear! By the end of the movie, I didn't know what to feel. I just stared at the tv, dumbfounded, with a puzzled expression on my face, not to mention a massive headache, and asked in a flat voice, "What just happened?" This is not the Miyazaki I know. The Miyazaki I know puts out movies that you thoroughly enjoy, have characters you fall in love with, make you think all the little things in life, and basically make you think, "Wow, what a good movie!" Princess Mononoke fails to do those things! Oh sure, it looks better than most other anime works from the time, and it does have good music, but that can't cover the mess of a film PM is. And yet, everywhere I go, people, including complete whores of Japanese culture, and "real" anime fans who act like only they know what's best, orgy over this film for reasons and logic that escape me! Why!? WHY!?
Granted, PM is not as much of a trainwreck as nearly every other anime that got dumped into America during the '90's, but it was still a major letdown. But hey, I only rented it; I didn't buy it.
Try before you buy . . . it's a lifesaver.
Now I aren't stuck in xenogears! ROCK!!!!!!
I got past where I was stuck. Know how? Simple; I got lucky. "Ya just keep goin' 'til ya get a decent hand!" That's a quote . . . a quote I made up. But it worked. Now I'm getting places again.
AND, I now have a character in my party that I genuinely like; Billy, the religious man with guns! His backstory is fascinating, and his guns are too cool! Now things are pickin' up!
Guess I'll be occupied for a little longer. Thursday's my last day this semester; can't wait.
AND, I now have a character in my party that I genuinely like; Billy, the religious man with guns! His backstory is fascinating, and his guns are too cool! Now things are pickin' up!
Guess I'll be occupied for a little longer. Thursday's my last day this semester; can't wait.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
"Oh noes! I R stuck N teh Xenogearz! Now I needzorz theh (emulated) game sharks to winz!!!!" (not really. I don't cheat in games.)
Having finished FF7, I went back to Xenogears. And now . . . I'm stuck. There's a boss fight in there that's really REALLY hard, and I can't get past it. And this, after finally meeting a character in XG that I like: the captain of the Thames! A man's man if ever I knew one!
So then, the semester's almost over. I'm taking the upcoming summer semester off. I will return to school in the fall. (yeah, and I'm gonna make it up with way more classes than I normally take.) Understand, this is my sixth straight college semester I'm finishing; I now need a lengthy break. Thursday is my last day. When I'm done next thursday, I plan to do a few things:
-Exercise more often. Lose some weight. Well, I'm not considered overweight, but I could stand to lose a little body fat.
-Start renting PS2 games again. There's some new games still coming out for the PS2, and I wanna try them out.
-Continue writing: not just this blog, but my project. Yes, I have a project. No, you can't see it.
-"acquire" more PS1 games. Hey, I still got a few titles in mind . . .
And that's just a sample of my plans for the summer. It's gonna be awesome. Just five more days . . . . . . . .
So then, the semester's almost over. I'm taking the upcoming summer semester off. I will return to school in the fall. (yeah, and I'm gonna make it up with way more classes than I normally take.) Understand, this is my sixth straight college semester I'm finishing; I now need a lengthy break. Thursday is my last day. When I'm done next thursday, I plan to do a few things:
-Exercise more often. Lose some weight. Well, I'm not considered overweight, but I could stand to lose a little body fat.
-Start renting PS2 games again. There's some new games still coming out for the PS2, and I wanna try them out.
-Continue writing: not just this blog, but my project. Yes, I have a project. No, you can't see it.
-"acquire" more PS1 games. Hey, I still got a few titles in mind . . .
And that's just a sample of my plans for the summer. It's gonna be awesome. Just five more days . . . . . . . .
Friday, April 18, 2008
Are you sinning in the house of Zack!?
Alright, you whores. Tell me right here and now; why FF7? Why is that the one you constantly orgy over? Especially considering that many of you so-called FF fans have played every major FF game that came out after FF7? To me, FF9, FF10, and FF12 are vastly improved-upon formulas of roleplaying when compared to FF7. Hell, FF8 has an even better storyline than FF7, but no, you have to constantly shout, "Dood! Whut thuh phuk!? Squall is fucking emo!!!!!!111!!" Granted, I don't like Squall either, but Cloud isn't a whole lot different from Squall, and yet you worship Spikey Head like he's your personal savior!
There's something else, too. As you know, I have come to really hate people who whore themselves to Japanese pop culture. The internet knows them as otakus. I know otakus in the real world who were turned to the otaku side not because of a shitty retro '90's anime, but rather, because of a videogame. A game you know as FF7. Even despite the game's strengths, it will always have this stigma attached to it; that it was partially responsible for the first otakulypse, the one of the late '90's.
Once, I encountered a troll of the internet. This troll claimed that FF10 was a bad game, that it sucked compared to FF7. How can that be, though? In my mind, FF7 is like an early beta build of FF10, for 10 has superior graphics, music, gameplay, and writing to 7. And yet, this troll said FF10 sucked compared to 7. Why? His sole reason was because FF10 was, "really fucking gay." How's that for you? Somebody who ignores whatever greatness is in FF10 by use of homophobic bullshit. This is the fanbase that surrounds the most popular stat-based RPG in the world, peoples. These are also the same people who bought Kingdom Hearts I and II when they first came out simply because of their inclusion of FF7 characters. Oh sure, there are intelligent FF7 lovers out there, but they are few and far between.
But if you hate FF7, don't think you're getting away unscathed. Oh, you would be sadly mistaken if you thought it was "cool" to hate FF7. Sadly, mistaken.
In recent years, it has become cool to diss FF7 among hardcore gamers, especially since FF7 is popular with people who don't normally play videogames. "What could they know about games? They're just suckers for the hype." Elitism has reared its ugly head regarding FF7, and I have noticed a common trait among FF7 bashers; most of them list FF6 as their favorite RPG.
Now, to be honest, FF6 is superior to FF7. Superior in music, story, magic system, even graphics. However, I have a little revelation to make. My favorite parts in FF6 are the opera, the final boss fight, and the ending. Take away those three things. Now for this; I enjoyed the first disc of FF7 more than the entirety of FF6, minus the opera and the last scenes, of course. Yeah, FF7 actually starts off more fun than FF6 did. I mean, FF7 isn't as buggy as the original SNES version of FF6, that's for sure. And yet, you overlook this and act like you're superior because you prefer a game that isn't popular with "normal people." FF6 isn't perfect, either. Hell, I can't even interpret half the dialog in FF6.
But now something else; FF6 AND 7 aren't as good as FF4, 9, 10, and 12. And that's just Final Fantasy games. Look at all the stat-based RPGs I enjoyed more than FF6 and 7 that aren't Final Fantasy: Diablo II, the first Knights of the Old Republic, Chrono Trigger, Tales of Phantasia, Tales of the Abyss, Tales of Vesperia, Xenosaga episode III, Disgaea 2, Seiken Densetsu 3, Dragon Quest VIII, Mother 3, Lunar: Silver Star Story Complete, Persona 4, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night. And these are just games I've played. Who knows how many others are better.
So everyone, do yourselves a favor, stop obsessing over Cloud's personal problems. Stop obsessing over Tifa's body. Stop obsessing over Aeris' role in the well-being of the Planet. Stop obsessing over Sephiroth's relationship with Jenova. ("LOL! Oedipus complex! LOL!!" okay, that was pretty funny, actually.) And especially stop claiming that FF7 has the best story in a videogame ever when you haven't even played that many videogames. The world will be a little more sane if you can accomplish that.
But also, stop hating FF7 when there are worse RPGs out there. The Phantasy Star series is way more flawed than FF7 ever was. And every Dragon Quest game that isn't DQ5 or DQ8 has a worse storyline than FF7. Go hate on them more, and spare me your delinquency!!!
That's it. Now I must resort to obsessing over the one thing in FF7 that is worth obsessing over; the music. The Advent Children remix of Tifa's theme always soothes my nerves after any blood-boiling situation. But I wouldn't have to listen to that song if you fuckers hadn't turned loving or hating FF7 into an internet past time.
GO AWAY!!!!!!!
EDIT: This article was updated on March 26th, 2009. I listed more RPGs that are better than FF6 and FF7. Shut up, already.
There's something else, too. As you know, I have come to really hate people who whore themselves to Japanese pop culture. The internet knows them as otakus. I know otakus in the real world who were turned to the otaku side not because of a shitty retro '90's anime, but rather, because of a videogame. A game you know as FF7. Even despite the game's strengths, it will always have this stigma attached to it; that it was partially responsible for the first otakulypse, the one of the late '90's.
Once, I encountered a troll of the internet. This troll claimed that FF10 was a bad game, that it sucked compared to FF7. How can that be, though? In my mind, FF7 is like an early beta build of FF10, for 10 has superior graphics, music, gameplay, and writing to 7. And yet, this troll said FF10 sucked compared to 7. Why? His sole reason was because FF10 was, "really fucking gay." How's that for you? Somebody who ignores whatever greatness is in FF10 by use of homophobic bullshit. This is the fanbase that surrounds the most popular stat-based RPG in the world, peoples. These are also the same people who bought Kingdom Hearts I and II when they first came out simply because of their inclusion of FF7 characters. Oh sure, there are intelligent FF7 lovers out there, but they are few and far between.
But if you hate FF7, don't think you're getting away unscathed. Oh, you would be sadly mistaken if you thought it was "cool" to hate FF7. Sadly, mistaken.
In recent years, it has become cool to diss FF7 among hardcore gamers, especially since FF7 is popular with people who don't normally play videogames. "What could they know about games? They're just suckers for the hype." Elitism has reared its ugly head regarding FF7, and I have noticed a common trait among FF7 bashers; most of them list FF6 as their favorite RPG.
Now, to be honest, FF6 is superior to FF7. Superior in music, story, magic system, even graphics. However, I have a little revelation to make. My favorite parts in FF6 are the opera, the final boss fight, and the ending. Take away those three things. Now for this; I enjoyed the first disc of FF7 more than the entirety of FF6, minus the opera and the last scenes, of course. Yeah, FF7 actually starts off more fun than FF6 did. I mean, FF7 isn't as buggy as the original SNES version of FF6, that's for sure. And yet, you overlook this and act like you're superior because you prefer a game that isn't popular with "normal people." FF6 isn't perfect, either. Hell, I can't even interpret half the dialog in FF6.
But now something else; FF6 AND 7 aren't as good as FF4, 9, 10, and 12. And that's just Final Fantasy games. Look at all the stat-based RPGs I enjoyed more than FF6 and 7 that aren't Final Fantasy: Diablo II, the first Knights of the Old Republic, Chrono Trigger, Tales of Phantasia, Tales of the Abyss, Tales of Vesperia, Xenosaga episode III, Disgaea 2, Seiken Densetsu 3, Dragon Quest VIII, Mother 3, Lunar: Silver Star Story Complete, Persona 4, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night. And these are just games I've played. Who knows how many others are better.
So everyone, do yourselves a favor, stop obsessing over Cloud's personal problems. Stop obsessing over Tifa's body. Stop obsessing over Aeris' role in the well-being of the Planet. Stop obsessing over Sephiroth's relationship with Jenova. ("LOL! Oedipus complex! LOL!!" okay, that was pretty funny, actually.) And especially stop claiming that FF7 has the best story in a videogame ever when you haven't even played that many videogames. The world will be a little more sane if you can accomplish that.
But also, stop hating FF7 when there are worse RPGs out there. The Phantasy Star series is way more flawed than FF7 ever was. And every Dragon Quest game that isn't DQ5 or DQ8 has a worse storyline than FF7. Go hate on them more, and spare me your delinquency!!!
That's it. Now I must resort to obsessing over the one thing in FF7 that is worth obsessing over; the music. The Advent Children remix of Tifa's theme always soothes my nerves after any blood-boiling situation. But I wouldn't have to listen to that song if you fuckers hadn't turned loving or hating FF7 into an internet past time.
GO AWAY!!!!!!!
EDIT: This article was updated on March 26th, 2009. I listed more RPGs that are better than FF6 and FF7. Shut up, already.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
And Aeris said, "Let there be Holy."
Final Fantasy 7 is an exceptional game. It was the first game in the franchise to use real-time 3D graphics, and the first released for CD-ROM. Technologically, it could accomplish things previous Final Fantasies could not, and it would go on to be the best selling game in the entire FF lineup, the best selling singleplayer RPG ever, and the second-best selling PS1 game ever, behind only the original Gran Turismo. Is it really that great?
Mostly yes. Kind of no.
The game is like any other Japanese RPG; run around, kill things with a battle system more sophisticated than the one in your average action shooter, gain experience, look for treasure, fight boss foes, max out your stats, and watch non-interactive sequences we nowadays call cutscenes. Doesn't sound too original, but bear in mind, this was the first video RPG to break into mainstream success. For many gamers, this was their first experience with a game that rewarded your killing of enemies by making your characters stronger. This was also many gamers' first experience with a game that tried to tell a real story, one with character growth, a defined world, and villains you just love to hate.
And it's certainly a solid game. Throughout disc 1, which contains roughly the first half of FF7, it's a very solid game. The prologue in Midgar is one of the most memorable sequences in videogame history. Everything happens so fast, lives are taken at such a breakneck speed, it's like an action movie with intelligence. And when you leave Midgar, though things don't happen as quickly, it still grips you. We learn that Sephiroth used to be a good man, but lost himself in his hatred of the human race. We learn that most of the playable characters have lost something precious to Shinra Incorporated, the corporation that literally rules the world in FF7. And at least one scene involving Aeris, FF7's obligatory pretty girl, will stick in your mind long after you've finished the game.
Then it's time for disc 2 and . . . things slow down. Plot development moves slowly, the game itself isn't as fun, the dungeons are less creative, and it stays this way, even to the end of disc 3, and the game itself. The ending isn't as memorable as the ending of most other FF games, either. The materia system, while innovative, requires much micromanagement, and limits how much magic your party can use during a battle. It's not as fun as the magic systems from FF5, FF6, FF9, FF10, and FF12, but at the very least, materia isn't broken like the GF system from FF8.
Much has also been said about the characters of FF7. Right now, I will tell you, the players of FF7 are nowhere near as memorable as the ones from FF6 and FF9. Cloud is the sullen anti-hero who cares only about himself, and even after discovering himself through the game, lacks the charisma of, say, Zidane from FF9. Aeris is basically a cuter version (What!? I like brunettes! Don't look at me like I'm diseased!) of Rosa from FF4 and Lenna from FF5. Tifa is almost exactly like Aeris. Cait Sith is bizarre in appearance and speech, Yuffie is a dorky teenage girl, Cid is a stereotypical blue collar engineer, Barret looks, and talks, like Mr. T from the A Team. Meanwhile, Red XIII is a very interesting character, no matter how you look at him. And Vincent, even after giving up on himself, has not given up on the rest of the world. Zack, although only having a minor role here, is very affable, and some of his personality did rub off on Cloud, although only a little. And then you have the villains. Most of the Shinra execs: Shinra, Rufus, Scarlet, and Heidegger particularly, are selfish, greedy, corrupt people, who make the actions of Enron look like child's play. And Hojo, the head scientist of Shinra, is an absolute monster, willing to sacrifice life and cast aside morality all for the pursuit of scientific progress. Oddly enough, these people are more evil than Sephiroth, the endboss. The only reason he's the endboss is simply because he's the most powerful, the most dangerous. And yet, Sephiroth is a little more than your average villain, too. When he discovered the truth behind his powers, he could've rebelled against Shinra, like Cloud eventually did. But instead, he viewed himself as being superior to the full-blooded humans, and vowed to pass judgment on them by calling down Meteor. In his mind, a few sins by some bad humans warrants an entire act of genocide against them. I won't compare Sephiroth to Kefka from FF6, Seymour from FF10, or even Vayne from FF12, but there's more to him besides a large sword and fashionable grey hair.
And I save the best for last; what really stands strong in FF7 is the music. Despite having worse sound quality than FF6, and the later FF games, Nobuo Uematsu composed yet another masterpiece. Granted, some of the scores are forgettable, and some scores sound better in the numerous arrangements that have come out since FF7's release, but much of the music really sets the mood. Some pieces really stand out, like "Anxious Heart", "Cosmo Canyon", "Fortress of the Condor" "Mako Reactor", Vincent's theme, Sephiroth's theme, the final boss themes, the world map theme, and especially all variations of Aeris' theme. It's no surprise that so many people adore Final Fantasy music. This game, having introduced many to the world of FF, has strong music. Get some MP3's if you haven't already!
So, FF7. Not as good as FF4, 6, 9, 10, and 12. Not as good as many other RPGs. Is it overrated? Yes. Is it majorly overrated? No, of course not. There is a good game in FF7, beyond the weak graphics and the story that nearly disappears after disc one. There does exist a great soundtrack, a few memorable characters, and a really cool sequence during the final battle. (Hint: it involves Cloud and Sephiroth, and nobody else.) And even if you don't adore FF7, at least it's better than FF3 for the NES and DS.
Final Fantasy 7 overview:
Good stuff: Large world to explore, not too challenging, phenomenal music, limit breaks are fun, and a story that starts off strongly . . .
Bad stuff: . . . and falters about halfway through. Equipping and un-equipping materia is a chore, poor graphics, no analog precision.
Final score: 9 out of 10. If the entire game was like the beginning in Midgar, it could've been totally astronomical . . .
Mostly yes. Kind of no.
The game is like any other Japanese RPG; run around, kill things with a battle system more sophisticated than the one in your average action shooter, gain experience, look for treasure, fight boss foes, max out your stats, and watch non-interactive sequences we nowadays call cutscenes. Doesn't sound too original, but bear in mind, this was the first video RPG to break into mainstream success. For many gamers, this was their first experience with a game that rewarded your killing of enemies by making your characters stronger. This was also many gamers' first experience with a game that tried to tell a real story, one with character growth, a defined world, and villains you just love to hate.
And it's certainly a solid game. Throughout disc 1, which contains roughly the first half of FF7, it's a very solid game. The prologue in Midgar is one of the most memorable sequences in videogame history. Everything happens so fast, lives are taken at such a breakneck speed, it's like an action movie with intelligence. And when you leave Midgar, though things don't happen as quickly, it still grips you. We learn that Sephiroth used to be a good man, but lost himself in his hatred of the human race. We learn that most of the playable characters have lost something precious to Shinra Incorporated, the corporation that literally rules the world in FF7. And at least one scene involving Aeris, FF7's obligatory pretty girl, will stick in your mind long after you've finished the game.
Then it's time for disc 2 and . . . things slow down. Plot development moves slowly, the game itself isn't as fun, the dungeons are less creative, and it stays this way, even to the end of disc 3, and the game itself. The ending isn't as memorable as the ending of most other FF games, either. The materia system, while innovative, requires much micromanagement, and limits how much magic your party can use during a battle. It's not as fun as the magic systems from FF5, FF6, FF9, FF10, and FF12, but at the very least, materia isn't broken like the GF system from FF8.
Much has also been said about the characters of FF7. Right now, I will tell you, the players of FF7 are nowhere near as memorable as the ones from FF6 and FF9. Cloud is the sullen anti-hero who cares only about himself, and even after discovering himself through the game, lacks the charisma of, say, Zidane from FF9. Aeris is basically a cuter version (What!? I like brunettes! Don't look at me like I'm diseased!) of Rosa from FF4 and Lenna from FF5. Tifa is almost exactly like Aeris. Cait Sith is bizarre in appearance and speech, Yuffie is a dorky teenage girl, Cid is a stereotypical blue collar engineer, Barret looks, and talks, like Mr. T from the A Team. Meanwhile, Red XIII is a very interesting character, no matter how you look at him. And Vincent, even after giving up on himself, has not given up on the rest of the world. Zack, although only having a minor role here, is very affable, and some of his personality did rub off on Cloud, although only a little. And then you have the villains. Most of the Shinra execs: Shinra, Rufus, Scarlet, and Heidegger particularly, are selfish, greedy, corrupt people, who make the actions of Enron look like child's play. And Hojo, the head scientist of Shinra, is an absolute monster, willing to sacrifice life and cast aside morality all for the pursuit of scientific progress. Oddly enough, these people are more evil than Sephiroth, the endboss. The only reason he's the endboss is simply because he's the most powerful, the most dangerous. And yet, Sephiroth is a little more than your average villain, too. When he discovered the truth behind his powers, he could've rebelled against Shinra, like Cloud eventually did. But instead, he viewed himself as being superior to the full-blooded humans, and vowed to pass judgment on them by calling down Meteor. In his mind, a few sins by some bad humans warrants an entire act of genocide against them. I won't compare Sephiroth to Kefka from FF6, Seymour from FF10, or even Vayne from FF12, but there's more to him besides a large sword and fashionable grey hair.
And I save the best for last; what really stands strong in FF7 is the music. Despite having worse sound quality than FF6, and the later FF games, Nobuo Uematsu composed yet another masterpiece. Granted, some of the scores are forgettable, and some scores sound better in the numerous arrangements that have come out since FF7's release, but much of the music really sets the mood. Some pieces really stand out, like "Anxious Heart", "Cosmo Canyon", "Fortress of the Condor" "Mako Reactor", Vincent's theme, Sephiroth's theme, the final boss themes, the world map theme, and especially all variations of Aeris' theme. It's no surprise that so many people adore Final Fantasy music. This game, having introduced many to the world of FF, has strong music. Get some MP3's if you haven't already!
So, FF7. Not as good as FF4, 6, 9, 10, and 12. Not as good as many other RPGs. Is it overrated? Yes. Is it majorly overrated? No, of course not. There is a good game in FF7, beyond the weak graphics and the story that nearly disappears after disc one. There does exist a great soundtrack, a few memorable characters, and a really cool sequence during the final battle. (Hint: it involves Cloud and Sephiroth, and nobody else.) And even if you don't adore FF7, at least it's better than FF3 for the NES and DS.
Final Fantasy 7 overview:
Good stuff: Large world to explore, not too challenging, phenomenal music, limit breaks are fun, and a story that starts off strongly . . .
Bad stuff: . . . and falters about halfway through. Equipping and un-equipping materia is a chore, poor graphics, no analog precision.
Final score: 9 out of 10. If the entire game was like the beginning in Midgar, it could've been totally astronomical . . .
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Forgive us our sins, but deliver us from Hojo
According to the walkthrough I'm using, I only have two things left to do; go through Midgar again, then switch to disc 3 and finish the score with Sephy once and for all. I can feel the end approaching. My destiny at the Northern Crater awaits.
I will have two last article concerning the original FF7 after this (two more riffs off religious messages for titles, basically. At least when it concerns FF7.) The next article will be a formal review summarizing my thoughts on this game. I can't finish it until I finish the game, though. So be patient.
The article after that, and the last one in this FF7 extravaganza of mine, will be some final thoughts of mine, aimed directly at the fanbase. However, what I have to say is not entirely pleasant. I have another hint as to what to expect; if you ever ejaculated over anything about FF7 that wasn't the music, I will hose you. However, if you ever bashed FF7 for illegitimate reasons, I will also hose you. Considering FF7's impact on the industry, I will potentially be challenging millions of you out there. I already know that several people I know in the real world will not be too pleased with my upcoming rant. I can't promise it'll be as good as my Slayers rant, but I swear it'll be better than my Fruits Basket rant.
And I feel now is the best time to discuss this. When I finish, I will have experienced everything FF7-related short of Crisis Core, Before Crisis, and the Lost Episode of Dirge of Cerberus for cell phones. I'll get all of my feelings out now, and then move on with my life. But it'll be worth it; trust me.
P.S. Bahamut Zero. I've never seen a summon own like Bahamut Zero. Except maybe Knights of the Round. But, I only know about KOTR because I saw it on youtube.
I will have two last article concerning the original FF7 after this (two more riffs off religious messages for titles, basically. At least when it concerns FF7.) The next article will be a formal review summarizing my thoughts on this game. I can't finish it until I finish the game, though. So be patient.
The article after that, and the last one in this FF7 extravaganza of mine, will be some final thoughts of mine, aimed directly at the fanbase. However, what I have to say is not entirely pleasant. I have another hint as to what to expect; if you ever ejaculated over anything about FF7 that wasn't the music, I will hose you. However, if you ever bashed FF7 for illegitimate reasons, I will also hose you. Considering FF7's impact on the industry, I will potentially be challenging millions of you out there. I already know that several people I know in the real world will not be too pleased with my upcoming rant. I can't promise it'll be as good as my Slayers rant, but I swear it'll be better than my Fruits Basket rant.
And I feel now is the best time to discuss this. When I finish, I will have experienced everything FF7-related short of Crisis Core, Before Crisis, and the Lost Episode of Dirge of Cerberus for cell phones. I'll get all of my feelings out now, and then move on with my life. But it'll be worth it; trust me.
P.S. Bahamut Zero. I've never seen a summon own like Bahamut Zero. Except maybe Knights of the Round. But, I only know about KOTR because I saw it on youtube.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Glory to Vincent!
There's something odd about Vincent in the original FF7; some of his dialog feels, off. When compared to how he speaks in Advent Children and Dirge of Cerberus, the way he speaks in FF7 feels off. And I know why. It's as the stereotypical Goth kids in South Park would phrase it; he's not Goth enough. Come on, this is a man who's lost everything; who can never be happy for himself again. He's one of the most tragic figures in videogame history, and yet, he fights for hope anyways. Despite being unable to let go of his feelings for Lucrecia, he stills fights to make the world a better place. Isn't that what makes a hero? Oh, I'm sure once the (as of now) hypothetical remake comes out, this'll be corrected.
Something of note; in the FF7 spinoffs, Vincent's English voice is portrayed by Steven Jay Blum, who also did the English voice of Spike Spiegel in Cowboy Bebop. In the flashback sequences of DOC, before Vincent was transformed, he sounds almost exactly like Spike. He even shouts "Lucrecia!" the same way Spike shouts "Julia!"
As for where I'm at? I got Cloud back, and I'm still on disc 2. I have collected two huge materia, and am working on the third. Word of advice, Ultima makes the bad people go away, fast. Forget summons, Ultima is where it's at!
Before I sign off, I should warn you; I will finish this look back at FF7 with an article that both praises FF7 fanatics and scolds them. Oh yes, a fanbase can be loved and hated at the same time, my dear internet. That won't come until I've finished the game, of course, but be ready. I will give you one hint; FF7 won't be the only game I attack.
Something of note; in the FF7 spinoffs, Vincent's English voice is portrayed by Steven Jay Blum, who also did the English voice of Spike Spiegel in Cowboy Bebop. In the flashback sequences of DOC, before Vincent was transformed, he sounds almost exactly like Spike. He even shouts "Lucrecia!" the same way Spike shouts "Julia!"
As for where I'm at? I got Cloud back, and I'm still on disc 2. I have collected two huge materia, and am working on the third. Word of advice, Ultima makes the bad people go away, fast. Forget summons, Ultima is where it's at!
Before I sign off, I should warn you; I will finish this look back at FF7 with an article that both praises FF7 fanatics and scolds them. Oh yes, a fanbase can be loved and hated at the same time, my dear internet. That won't come until I've finished the game, of course, but be ready. I will give you one hint; FF7 won't be the only game I attack.
Monday, April 14, 2008
All hail Nanaki!
I got the airship. Cid is currently the party leader, and my two extra characters are, you guessed it, Yuffie and Red XIII.
However, ever since I got to disc 2, the story has been starting to, lag. It was fun to see Tifa slap Scarlet, that mean blonde chick, repeatedly, but things haven't been hooking me as much, story-wise. I get the feeling that the most memorable sequences in this game are the beginning in Midgar, the events in Nibelheim that led to Sephiroth's madness, the tragic past of Vincent, Red XIII's past, Barret's past, and That Famous Scene At the End of Disc One(tm). Otherwise, I can't really call it a masterpiece of storytelling. Sure, it tells a better story than, say, the Halo games, but it's weird how FF7 is usually regarded as the epitome of high art in videogames when other games, including other Square-Enix games, surpass it.
Nonetheless, using limit breaks is fun. (even though I like the overdrive system in FF10 more.) And why summon Bahamut when you can summon . . . Neo Bahamut!? Yeah, baby, YEAH! It's so easy to level up in this game; just spam your most powerful summons, and when you run out of MP, rest at an inn or in the airship. Say, is this why the summons in the later games (besides FF10.) are less powerful? Maybe.
So here's hoping I can finish the game soon.
However, ever since I got to disc 2, the story has been starting to, lag. It was fun to see Tifa slap Scarlet, that mean blonde chick, repeatedly, but things haven't been hooking me as much, story-wise. I get the feeling that the most memorable sequences in this game are the beginning in Midgar, the events in Nibelheim that led to Sephiroth's madness, the tragic past of Vincent, Red XIII's past, Barret's past, and That Famous Scene At the End of Disc One(tm). Otherwise, I can't really call it a masterpiece of storytelling. Sure, it tells a better story than, say, the Halo games, but it's weird how FF7 is usually regarded as the epitome of high art in videogames when other games, including other Square-Enix games, surpass it.
Nonetheless, using limit breaks is fun. (even though I like the overdrive system in FF10 more.) And why summon Bahamut when you can summon . . . Neo Bahamut!? Yeah, baby, YEAH! It's so easy to level up in this game; just spam your most powerful summons, and when you run out of MP, rest at an inn or in the airship. Say, is this why the summons in the later games (besides FF10.) are less powerful? Maybe.
So here's hoping I can finish the game soon.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Can Bahamut find it within itself to . . .
. . . Oh, who am I kidding!? Why am I continuing to feign guilt over playing FF7!? I felt more guilty when I played FF8 two years ago, and I actually bought FF8! Well, it was only thirteen dollars, but still!
I see no reason to act like I've wronged the hardcore gamer world by playing through FF7 anymore. Sure, I don't like it like I like FF4, 9, 10, and 12, not to mention several other RPGs, but FF7 has proven quite enjoyable.
Right now, I'm on disc 2. Which means I have now witnessed The Most Famous Scene in Final Fantasy History(tm) outside of youtube. It sure was heartbreaking, about as heartbreaking as the ending to FF10. However, as a consequence of witnessing The Most Famous Scene in Final Fantasy History(tm), Aeris' theme is now stuck in my head. And not the orchestral arrangement from the Reunion album nor the piano version from Advent Children either, the original MIDI score that you hear in the game. Someone help me.
Well, I have homework to do. Finals are next week, ya know. So, I'll sign off.
I see no reason to act like I've wronged the hardcore gamer world by playing through FF7 anymore. Sure, I don't like it like I like FF4, 9, 10, and 12, not to mention several other RPGs, but FF7 has proven quite enjoyable.
Right now, I'm on disc 2. Which means I have now witnessed The Most Famous Scene in Final Fantasy History(tm) outside of youtube. It sure was heartbreaking, about as heartbreaking as the ending to FF10. However, as a consequence of witnessing The Most Famous Scene in Final Fantasy History(tm), Aeris' theme is now stuck in my head. And not the orchestral arrangement from the Reunion album nor the piano version from Advent Children either, the original MIDI score that you hear in the game. Someone help me.
Well, I have homework to do. Finals are next week, ya know. So, I'll sign off.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
I must beg Bahamut for forgiveness
Guess who just went out on a date with Tifa Lockheart at the Gold Saucer?
*points fingers at himself* This guuuuuuuuy!
Well, okay, she's not really my type. And also, she's not a character I particularly like, but, ya know, it's fun to be able to go on a non-romantic date with somebody, even if its within the confines of a videogame.
And while Vincent may be my second-favorite character story-wise, gameplay-wise, uh, he falters. I don't like losing control of someone just because I wanted to perform a limit break. I did one of Vincent's limit breaks for a boss fight, and doing so made the fight a lot harder than it should've been.
So he's out. So I guess that means my party of choice is Cloud, Red XIII, and Yuffie. If I hadn't hired Yuffie, my third party member of choice would be either Barret or Cid. The real difference between characters are their limit breaks, and I've decided who's out based on limit breaks. Tifa's out, because I don't like timing button presses in a game that uses the ATB system, Cait Sith is out because I FUCKING HATE HIM AND HIS LIMIT BREAKS. Vincent's out because I lose control of him during a limit break, and Aeris is out because, I hear she leaves the party about halfway through the game and you can never use her again afterwards, or so I've heard.
So that means the ideal characters are Cloud, Barret, Cid, Yuffie, and Red XIII. Or Super Saiyan look-alike, Mr. T Impersonator, Gruff Engineer, Flighty Ninja Girl Who Failed the Naruto Auditions, and Panther Man Made of Win.
So this is the video stat-based RPG that took over the world back in the '90's? Huh. I still wish Chrono Trigger was the game that put RPGs into the mainstream, not FF7, but the world could've done worse.
The world could've chosen FF8 to be the first RPG blockbuster.
Or FF10-2.
*points fingers at himself* This guuuuuuuuy!
Well, okay, she's not really my type. And also, she's not a character I particularly like, but, ya know, it's fun to be able to go on a non-romantic date with somebody, even if its within the confines of a videogame.
And while Vincent may be my second-favorite character story-wise, gameplay-wise, uh, he falters. I don't like losing control of someone just because I wanted to perform a limit break. I did one of Vincent's limit breaks for a boss fight, and doing so made the fight a lot harder than it should've been.
So he's out. So I guess that means my party of choice is Cloud, Red XIII, and Yuffie. If I hadn't hired Yuffie, my third party member of choice would be either Barret or Cid. The real difference between characters are their limit breaks, and I've decided who's out based on limit breaks. Tifa's out, because I don't like timing button presses in a game that uses the ATB system, Cait Sith is out because I FUCKING HATE HIM AND HIS LIMIT BREAKS. Vincent's out because I lose control of him during a limit break, and Aeris is out because, I hear she leaves the party about halfway through the game and you can never use her again afterwards, or so I've heard.
So that means the ideal characters are Cloud, Barret, Cid, Yuffie, and Red XIII. Or Super Saiyan look-alike, Mr. T Impersonator, Gruff Engineer, Flighty Ninja Girl Who Failed the Naruto Auditions, and Panther Man Made of Win.
So this is the video stat-based RPG that took over the world back in the '90's? Huh. I still wish Chrono Trigger was the game that put RPGs into the mainstream, not FF7, but the world could've done worse.
The world could've chosen FF8 to be the first RPG blockbuster.
Or FF10-2.
Friday, April 11, 2008
I will surely burn in the fires of Nibelheim for my transgressions
Now I'm exploring new territory in FF7. This is it, peoples; I'm seriously gonna play through the entire game this time.
Also, I think it helps that I'm playing FF7 after the release of all the spinoffs. I actually picture some of the characters sounding like how they did in Advent Children and/or Dirge of Cerberus. I picture Cloud, Barret, Vincent, Yuffie, Tifa, and Cid sounding exactly like how they "officially" do. But not so some of the other characters.
For one, I picture Aeris sounding like a typical young woman, not like . . . a motherly figure with a very soft voice. I picture Cait Sith sounding like a hyperactive character from a children's cartoon show. I picture Red XIII sounding extremely intelligent yet emotionless at the same time. I picture Zack sounding like a typical anime protagonist.
And then there's Sephiroth. When he's speaking in his too-cool-for-you manner, I picture him with the deep voice he had in AC, a calm and collected bass range. When he starts getting emotional, I imagine him with an unsettling baritone. And when he's at the height of his madness, I imagine his voice to be a piercing tenor, sharp enough for the whole world to hear. Say, I wonder if he talks like that in Crisis Core?
But you know something? I don't like the materia system as much as the Esper system, AP system, sphere grid system, and license board from FF6, 9, 10, and 12. I find it annoying to have to change materia every time I swap party members.
Yeah, but, it's still better than Phantasy Star 4.
Also, I think it helps that I'm playing FF7 after the release of all the spinoffs. I actually picture some of the characters sounding like how they did in Advent Children and/or Dirge of Cerberus. I picture Cloud, Barret, Vincent, Yuffie, Tifa, and Cid sounding exactly like how they "officially" do. But not so some of the other characters.
For one, I picture Aeris sounding like a typical young woman, not like . . . a motherly figure with a very soft voice. I picture Cait Sith sounding like a hyperactive character from a children's cartoon show. I picture Red XIII sounding extremely intelligent yet emotionless at the same time. I picture Zack sounding like a typical anime protagonist.
And then there's Sephiroth. When he's speaking in his too-cool-for-you manner, I picture him with the deep voice he had in AC, a calm and collected bass range. When he starts getting emotional, I imagine him with an unsettling baritone. And when he's at the height of his madness, I imagine his voice to be a piercing tenor, sharp enough for the whole world to hear. Say, I wonder if he talks like that in Crisis Core?
But you know something? I don't like the materia system as much as the Esper system, AP system, sphere grid system, and license board from FF6, 9, 10, and 12. I find it annoying to have to change materia every time I swap party members.
Yeah, but, it's still better than Phantasy Star 4.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
My heresy knows no bounds
When I last played FF7, it was about seven years ago. (LOL! 7 years ago I last played FF7! What a coincidence!) I got to the town called Costa Del Sol . . . and that's when I had to return the game.
I haven't quite gotten to Costa Del Sol yet, so I'm still treading familiar territory. However, I did recruit someone I hadn't had the chance to use until now; Yuffie. Yes, the original (as far as I know anyways) teenage girl gigglebox. Not as amusing as her successor Rikku, but less annoying than her immediate successor Selphie, I have discovered why Yuffie is adored amongst the GameFAQkers; that chick knows how to throw down. She's currently apart of my preferred party. Since you can't substitute Spikey Head out, that leaves room for my other preferred party member, Red XIII. Why Red, though?
BECAUSE HE'S THE GODDAMN RED XIII!!!! YOU DON'T NEED A REASON BEYOND THAT!!!!
However, after revisiting this game well after its initial release, for both PS1 AND PC, I have discovered a few . . . issues that bother me.
For one, there is no analog precision. All the newer FF games in 3D have this, and it makes field movements a lot, LOT easier. Since I'm so spoiled, I find navigating anywhere that's not the world map to be somewhat awkward. Also, some of the pre-rendered backgrounds are hard to navigate, the train graveyard in Midgar being a notorious example. This, combined with no analog precision makes xm angry.
Also, while the game's dialog isn't as incomprehensible as the gibberish in FF6, it can still use touching up, beyond the typos, off course. There are a few good lines, but not like in the later FF games. I'm seeing a pattern, here.
One last thing before I move on; even if the game received a proper remake, you know, with better graphics, voice-acting, arranged music, better translation, and whatnot, I still don't think FF7 could be as good as, say, FF12. And also such an event could very well set in motion the second otakulypse, but FF1 thru 6 have seen remakes; I think it's only a matter of time before lucky #7 makes a comeback.
But still, flaws or not, FF7, as of so far, is still a very good game, even if its importance has been exaggerated over the years. I don't know, though, I hear the game falls apart after Grey Locks offs a certain someone, (No, not Shinra. After that event. Spoiler alert!) but the only way to know for sure is to play through the thing and find out myself. Here's hoping I can do that in due time.
I haven't quite gotten to Costa Del Sol yet, so I'm still treading familiar territory. However, I did recruit someone I hadn't had the chance to use until now; Yuffie. Yes, the original (as far as I know anyways) teenage girl gigglebox. Not as amusing as her successor Rikku, but less annoying than her immediate successor Selphie, I have discovered why Yuffie is adored amongst the GameFAQkers; that chick knows how to throw down. She's currently apart of my preferred party. Since you can't substitute Spikey Head out, that leaves room for my other preferred party member, Red XIII. Why Red, though?
BECAUSE HE'S THE GODDAMN RED XIII!!!! YOU DON'T NEED A REASON BEYOND THAT!!!!
However, after revisiting this game well after its initial release, for both PS1 AND PC, I have discovered a few . . . issues that bother me.
For one, there is no analog precision. All the newer FF games in 3D have this, and it makes field movements a lot, LOT easier. Since I'm so spoiled, I find navigating anywhere that's not the world map to be somewhat awkward. Also, some of the pre-rendered backgrounds are hard to navigate, the train graveyard in Midgar being a notorious example. This, combined with no analog precision makes xm angry.
Also, while the game's dialog isn't as incomprehensible as the gibberish in FF6, it can still use touching up, beyond the typos, off course. There are a few good lines, but not like in the later FF games. I'm seeing a pattern, here.
One last thing before I move on; even if the game received a proper remake, you know, with better graphics, voice-acting, arranged music, better translation, and whatnot, I still don't think FF7 could be as good as, say, FF12. And also such an event could very well set in motion the second otakulypse, but FF1 thru 6 have seen remakes; I think it's only a matter of time before lucky #7 makes a comeback.
But still, flaws or not, FF7, as of so far, is still a very good game, even if its importance has been exaggerated over the years. I don't know, though, I hear the game falls apart after Grey Locks offs a certain someone, (No, not Shinra. After that event. Spoiler alert!) but the only way to know for sure is to play through the thing and find out myself. Here's hoping I can do that in due time.
Monday, April 7, 2008
Forgive me, my brethren, for I have sinned
Yesterday, I got bored with Xenogears. The game is 20% gameplay, 80% slow, slow, slow . . . . . . moving text. I will return to the game in due time.
However, realizing that I have the power to emulate PS1 games with few (noticeable) glitches, I went ahead and reminded myself, "Hey, I own actual physical copies of Final Fantasy 8 and 9, but I never did play through all of FF7."
In my weakness, I downloaded an ISO of the most obsessed-over stat-based RPG ever. It is all I can play right now.
Yes, I know the graphics suck. Yes, Cloud can kiss my ass. Yes, the dialogue is not as good as the later FF games, but damn it, FF7 has Red XIII! And Vincent! And a great soundtrack!
Is FF7 overrated? Yes, when compared to games like FF4, FF9, FF10, CT, Tales of Phantasia, Tales of the Abyss, and the Knights of the Old Republic games. However, it's not as overrated as, say, the Halo games.
FUCK HALO!!!!!!
But on its own, FF7 is one of the better PS1 RPGs. Certainly faster-paced then XG, and not as broken as FF8, and the beginning in Midgar is more exciting then the first few hours of FF6. And . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . I like Sephiroth.
Please don't hurt me, hardcore 21st century nerds! I implore you, I am only a semi-nerd at best! I am allowed to play games that are popular with 'normal people'! Spare me this once!
But, I gotta admit, the girls of FF7 sure looked a lot better in Advent Children, and Kingdom Hearts II. But still, just what is it that guys see in Tifa, anyways. Besides the mammary glands. Can someone answer that for me?
But still, why now? Why only now am I playing through FF7 'for realz'? Crisis Core did recently come out in America, but I can't play that since I don't have a PSP. So, what? What is compelling me? What is compelling me to play a game with weak graphics and a story that, while good, is not a "classic" of the video game arts? Why?
Because no matter how much FF7 may be overvalued, it is still better than FF1, FF3, FF10-2, the Phantasy Star games for the Sega Master System and Genesis, and especially Earthbound. That's right; I said it. FF7 is more enjoyable then cult "classics" like Phantasy Star 2 and EB.
Now if Only Cloud was more like Zidane . . .
However, realizing that I have the power to emulate PS1 games with few (noticeable) glitches, I went ahead and reminded myself, "Hey, I own actual physical copies of Final Fantasy 8 and 9, but I never did play through all of FF7."
In my weakness, I downloaded an ISO of the most obsessed-over stat-based RPG ever. It is all I can play right now.
Yes, I know the graphics suck. Yes, Cloud can kiss my ass. Yes, the dialogue is not as good as the later FF games, but damn it, FF7 has Red XIII! And Vincent! And a great soundtrack!
Is FF7 overrated? Yes, when compared to games like FF4, FF9, FF10, CT, Tales of Phantasia, Tales of the Abyss, and the Knights of the Old Republic games. However, it's not as overrated as, say, the Halo games.
FUCK HALO!!!!!!
But on its own, FF7 is one of the better PS1 RPGs. Certainly faster-paced then XG, and not as broken as FF8, and the beginning in Midgar is more exciting then the first few hours of FF6. And . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . I like Sephiroth.
Please don't hurt me, hardcore 21st century nerds! I implore you, I am only a semi-nerd at best! I am allowed to play games that are popular with 'normal people'! Spare me this once!
But, I gotta admit, the girls of FF7 sure looked a lot better in Advent Children, and Kingdom Hearts II. But still, just what is it that guys see in Tifa, anyways. Besides the mammary glands. Can someone answer that for me?
But still, why now? Why only now am I playing through FF7 'for realz'? Crisis Core did recently come out in America, but I can't play that since I don't have a PSP. So, what? What is compelling me? What is compelling me to play a game with weak graphics and a story that, while good, is not a "classic" of the video game arts? Why?
Because no matter how much FF7 may be overvalued, it is still better than FF1, FF3, FF10-2, the Phantasy Star games for the Sega Master System and Genesis, and especially Earthbound. That's right; I said it. FF7 is more enjoyable then cult "classics" like Phantasy Star 2 and EB.
Now if Only Cloud was more like Zidane . . .
Friday, April 4, 2008
Spring cleaning
This is the one day of the week ('til the end of the semster, anyways.) that I have a lot of free time, so here goes some updates:
LATE EDIT: I'm not going into journalism, (I finally decided), but I do know more about writing impartially than most writers thanks to my journalism classes.
- Been playing Xenogears some more. I still like it. However, the story, while overall being good, is far from the "Award-winning classic!" everyone claims it to be. I haven't met any characters I like yet, and the whole thing seems to be a bizarre mish-mash of the Gundam franchise and Neon Genesis Evangelion. Ya know something? I liked Xenosaga III more than XG. At least it had faster, better gameplay. And Ziggy. And yet I still play XG. Why? The music.
- I went to the library, checked out some more, illustrative literature. You might see some more reviews on the future. I can tell you though I certainly didn't check out anymore Slayers manga, because FUCK SLAYERS.
- Pop quiz: you're driving down a road. There's no one in front of you or behind you. You are driving at a comfortable speed of 53 miles per hour, in a 50 zone. You are about to cross an intersection with lights. The light for your direction turns yellow. You are going fast enough that you feel you can make it on the yellow without speeding up. (you are going 53 after all.) However, the moment you begin to cross the intersection, the light turns red. At this point, you can't stop, you just keep going on, before the light turns green for another part of the intersection. Does it still count as running a red light, even if you weren't speeding, even if there was no one for miles and miles, and even if you just missed the yellow? Well, until I get my (hypothetical) fine in the mail, I guess the answer is no.
- I've been studying something. I finally learned why my journalism teacher back in high school gave up his career in scouring for news stories and took up teaching it instead; journalism is a crooked business. Don't believe me? Just look at how biased most news outlets have become. Instead of giving us the news, most in the biz would rather force their beliefs on us. And perpetuate long-standing stereotypes. And obsess over news outlets with a different agenda than yours. And you know what really takes the cake? One of my future career plans is majoring in journalism. Punditocracy, here I come! (Of course, I would never violate journalistic standards for my own gain.)
- Ya know, I really ought to be playing more games right now. Or studying. Why blog, when I can beat up robots . . . . . . . WITH MY BARE FISTS!?!?!?!
LATE EDIT: I'm not going into journalism, (I finally decided), but I do know more about writing impartially than most writers thanks to my journalism classes.
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