Hey guys, I had a dream last night. It started off, as a bad dream, but then, it ended, as a good dream. How? Simple, I reached for the heavens, despite all obstacles. Although inspired by Kamina, he was nowhere to be found in my dream, nor anything Gurren Lagaan-related for that matter, but I owe him my thanks for turning a bad dream into a good one.
How did it start? It started with people. People around me. People harassing me. The people around me were hating me, for a really, really, really stupid reason. No, I was not in high school again, this dream took place in the present day, in my neighborhood, at my college, and at my house. What were these people harassing me for?
Well, it's this: remember when I complained how grown men have to be careful if they like any shoujo anime, period? Yeah, well, someone found out I really like Cardcaptor Sakura.
"Oh, I get it! They assumed you were gay, because you were indulging in your girly sensitivities!"
No. That's probably what would happen in real life if someone knew that, and if they had an understanding of J-pop culture, but no, in the dream, it was worse.
They assumed I was a pedophile.
This is something I always feared. The times I admitted to liking CCS on the internet, I always feared some retard would assume I was into lolicon or kiddie porn or straight up child lovin'. I've seen people make these false accusations on the 'net before. Not to me, except in this dream. I became outcasted, for a crime I had not committed. It made me uncomfortable just to leave my house, and it pissed me off.
I did something about it, though. I sent a chain mail daring anybody who assumed I was a pedo to have a debate with me. In this debate, I would attempt to singlehandedly clear my name. The debate was held in my backyard. I let the accusers present their argument. They cited a number of things, (including this very blog! xm0123's Domain was featured in a dream!) in their case. These were there points:
-I have stated on numerous occasions that I think many female CLAMP characters are insanely cute and/or really pretty, including some of the little girl characters in CCS. (But that was all they could come up with)
Then came my refutation. I refuted that there's nothing wrong with admiring nice artwork. And it's possible for a man to think a child is insanely cute, and totally not have sexual feelings for them. The same is true of make-believe characters. Not only that, I then offered the accusers to search my hard drive for porn. They did. As they did, I covertly searched their homes, and guess what? I don't have any porn of any kind, certainly not kiddie porn. But guess that? My opponents had porn by the mountainload! Okay, none of them were pedophiles, but these hypocritical dickweeds think there's nothing wrong with being tit-obsessed misogynists. Having cleared my name, and exposed the accusers for the sexist pigs that they were, I warned them that next time they harass me like this, I'm going to respond like Sakura's lover; as in, I'll shoot a fireball at you, throw down some mad kickboxing on you, AND beat you over the head with a Chinese Jian, all at once. Seeing as how I was now fiery like Shaoran Li, they left. No one dare cross a CLAMP lover as dedicated as me!
So for those of you stupid enough to assume that grown men who like moe, shoujo, or, well, any girl-oriented aspect of J-pop culture are also automatically pedophiles, I laugh at you. I laugh, because you are making an ass of yourself. Not all of us are like Kona-chan's dad. (He's one of the more amusing characters of Lucky Star.)
And seriously, what the hell, man? Me, sexually attracted to a little heorine like Sakura-chan? Her legs are way too short and skinny to be sexy! I like my females a little more physically developed, thank-you-very-much!
GAWD!!!!!!
But hey, I triumphed in the end, that's what's important.
