"Chrono Crusade" THEY MADE ANOTHER CHRONO GAME!?!?!?!?!?
"Premise" There's this sect of the Catholic Church that's fighting evil demons, and their best line of defense is a demon boy and a teenage girl armed to the teeth! And it's set in 1920s America!
"Male Protagonist" A noble demon who kicks ass and is kind to humans, just don't make him angry.
"Female Protagonist" A nun who never says die. And loses her temper at the drop of a hat. And is always blowing shit up. Very fun character.
"Antagonist" An evil, though tragically misguided, figure. Not one-dimensional, surprisingly enough!
"Supporting cast" Nothing short of excellent.
"Story" Starts off like typical shonen fare, then becomes more serious. Extremely engaging.
"Action" Tons of it, all of which is beautifully illustrated.
"Comedy" Ha ha ha! Rosette is giving Chrono a noogie! Ha ha ha!
"Tragedy" Dang. The First World War sucked.
"Flashbacks" It's all so painful!
"Plot Exposition" Smooth and with no filler; the way I like it.
"Anime Adaptation" HIGHLY UNACCEPTABLE!
"English Dub" AAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!
"What We're Supposed to Take From It" Life is short. You may never get another chance to tell a loved one, "I love you," so make the most of your life while you still can.
"What we DO take from it" NUNS WITH GUNS!!!!!!
"Thumbs up?" Yes, so long as you avoid the anime.
"Last word" Didn't I already say this was my favorite shonen action series? So what are you waiting for!?
"Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle" What does a newspaper have to do with a reservoir and the Japanese word for "Wing(s)"?
"Premise" These four people are looking for these magical feathers so that they can save the multiverse . . . going into any further detail will cause my head to explode.
"Male Protagonist" The 1st one is a boring generic RPG lead. The 2nd is a musclebound "ninja" who is rough around the edges. The 3rd . . . is cool incarnate.
"Female Protagonist" Sweet, delicate, beautiful . . . and can kill giant worms with a revolver. In short, my kind of woman.
"Antagonist" A guy with a huge chin who screws with people just to do . . . something, I can't reveal because of my spoiler clause.
"Supporting cast" They help move the plot forward.
"Story" Feels like an epic RPG, but with most of the random encounters cut out. And then, it gets convoluted, again, like most epic RPGs.
"Action" So explosive, it's like the fights are leaping right off the pages!
"Comedy" Uh . . . Fai and Mokona have a few one-liners.
"Tragedy" *sobs* The past is so painful!
"Flashbacks" *sobs* The past is so painful . . . and convoluted, and painfully convoluted!
"Plot Exposition" A lot. Thank Ashura-O for Wikipedia.
"Anime Adaptation" Why do all the action sequences look and feel like music videos?
"English Dub" laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame
"What We're Supposed To Take From It" No matter how many hardships you encounter, you can overcome all of them, but only if you have the determination to see it through to the end.
"What we DO take from it" Fai And Kurogane Oh Tee Pee!
"Thumbs up?" Sure . . . if you don't mind insane plot twists.
"Last word" This is my favorite CLAMP series, so take from that what you will.
"Kurokami" KAMI! *sighs* I'm sorry, I thought I wouldn't quote Death Note for this.
"Premise" There's a race of people who are like regular humans, but with super strength! And they can form a pact with a regular human to make them even stronger! But if either one dies when they are "synched", so does the other!
"Male Protagonist" (first impression) FUCK OFF AND DIE ALREADY!!!!! (second impression) Now he's focusing his rage on the bad people! This is great!
"Female Protagonist" iloveheriloveheriloveheriloveher
"Antagonist" . . . . . . my god. these people . . . are horrifying.
"Supporting cast" Every supporting character who's not Akane is awesome.
"Story" Rather wordy for what is essentially an excuse for people to fight one another.
"Action" The action in this series is orgasmic.
"Comedy" Kuro's ignorance of the world of Terrans is adorable!
"Tragedy" WHY MUST HORRIBLE THINGS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE!?!?!?!
"Flashbacks" half the time, it's "WHY MUST HORRIBLE THINGS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE!?!?!?!" The other half of the time, it's, "Look at me! I'm such a douche! I take advantage of the people around me because I'm that much of a douche! Aren't I a great protagonist?"
"Plot Exposition" So much, it actually slows down the pace of everything. Some may actually welcome this, though.
"Anime Adaptation" Starts off great . . . then devolves into a Dragonball Z ripoff. Yeah.
"English Dub" Good enough for me!
"What We're Supposed To Take From It" No man is an island. Humanity as a whole is capable of great things, but in order for that to happen, you must take the first step to reach out to someone.
"What we DO take from it" Hot chicks beating the crap out of each other!
"Thumbs up?" Once you get to chapter 37, yes, by all means. Anytime before that . . . I can't make any promises.
"Last word" I sure hope you can tolerate the dickishness of Keita and the uselessness of Akane for five books. If so, your patience will pay off . . . . . . . . KURO-CHAN IS LOVE! (Sorry; I'm now contractually obliged to say that every time I bring up the subject of Kurokami.)
"Lucky Star" Count your lucky stars.
"Premise" A bunch of high school girls in Japan talk about anime, video games, food, moeblobs, and study habits.
"Male Protagonist" Uh . . . the closest thing this series has to a male protagonist is a middle-aged dad who's sexually attracted to short girls with tiny breasts. No, I did not make up that last sentence.
"Female Protagonist" Think every anime fangirl you've ever met, only much friendlier and much less of an elitist psychobitch; no wonder everyone loves her on myanimelist.net!
"Rival" An older sister to a moeblob who has extreme mood swings and scares away all of the cast members' potential boyfriends, and is also very beloved on myanimelist.net!
"Supporting cast" Think the girls from Azumanga Daioh, but with unrealistic hair colors and the physiques of 12 year olds. 12 year olds, Dude.
"Story" Plot? Who needs plot!?
"Action" Does surviving a visit to the dentist count as action?
"Comedy" *riotous laughter* Kagami's mockery of moe girls is killing me!
"Tragedy" Uh . . . I guess that whole thing with Konata's mom counts? But no one seemed depressed about that.
"Flashbacks" Not . . . substantial enough . . . to write something . . . witty about . . . . . . . . I am unworthy.
"Plot Exposition" Again, who needs plot?
"Anime Adaptation" Let's have a chat about snacks for six minutes straight! It'll become a legendary moment in anime!
"English Dub" I plugged this series' English voicetrack on the "Superlative Dubbing" page on tvtropes; what do you think my opinion on the dub is!?
"What We're Supposed To Take From It" Don't go to school events just to take pictures of schoolgirls, or your daughter will become very concerned about your habits.
"What we DO take from it" HOLY SHIT! GIRLS ARE TALKING ABOUT ANIME!!!!!!
"Thumbs up?" Eh.
"Last word" There will never be a high school comedy that can dethrone Haruhi. With that said, I suppose Lucky Star, in both anime and manga format, can pass the time.
"Slayers: Medieval Mayhem" As opposed to Jazz Age Mayhem?
"Premise" Intrepid adventurers go around and do stuff. Hilarious supposedly ensues.
"Male Protagonist" An idiot swordsman who feels the need to point out every large-chested woman he lays eyes on.
"Female Protagonist" An amoral sorceress who feels the need to point out how cute she is, in spite of how insecure she is about her chest.
"Supporting Cast" I'll come back to you on this one.
"Story" I think it's supposed to be a parody of the Dragon Quest and Final Fantasy games, but I wouldn't know nor care.
"Action" There is some, not that it matters.
"Comedy" IF POINTING HOW HOW SMALL LINA'S BREASTS ARE WASN'T FUNNY THE FIRST TIME, WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO IT 126 MORE TIMES!?!?!?!?!
"Tragedy" The only tragedy to be found is how soul-crushingly disappointed I was and still am with this entire goddamned franchise!
"Flashbacks" I DON'T CAAAAAAAAAAARE!
"Plot exposition" I DON'T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!
"Anime adaptation" Actually explains things better, but is still devoid of any entertainment value whatsoever.
"English dub" It was dubbed in the 1990s by someone other than Disney; you do the math on that one.
"What we're supposed to take from it" That the otakus who recommended this are completely full of shit and are just saying it because "Oh EM GEE! IT'S ANIME! THEREFORE IT'S AWESOME BY DEFAULT! U HU HU HU HU!"
"What we DO take from it" "ZOMG! SLAYERS! FUNNIEST ANIME EVARZ!!!!1"
"Thumbs up?" What!? Are you dense!? Are you retarded or something!? Did you not read my March 2008 review!? Can you not pick up on the hostility of this last part of the blog entry!? If not, then the answer is CAPITOL FUCKING N. CAPITOL FUCKING O.
"Last Word" This still remains the most overrated piece of Japanese pop culture I have ever seen that is not a video game. Is that something to be proud of? That's for you to decide.
END.
